Today's team journal was written by our Team Lead, Natalie Herr.
There is a lot of conflict in my house.
Let me backup.
There are a lot of people in my house. Seven, to be exact. Four of them are under the age of nine. If you do the math, it works out to twenty one different relationships under one roof! You can imagine how a conflict or two might arise in these conditions. (And that’s not even counting all the relationships we maintain outside our home. Yowza.)
Sometimes, the conflicts have nothing to do with me. Sometimes, I cause them. Sometimes, they are easy to resolve and sometimes, they take months or years to sort out. The bottom line for me (and I’d guess for you, too) is this: I find myself involved in conflict more often than I’d like.
If I had my way, I’d be living in a conflict-free world. Conflict has a way of bringing me down, you know? It’s not fun. It’s not easy. It takes too long. It keeps me from doing what I want to do. I would rather be doing almost anything else than sorting out a conflict (especially one that I think is foolish.) And that, my friends, is precisely why the Spirit wants me to engage in it. Regularly.
With His Spirit in us, we are like Him, and can make peace like Him.
At the beginning of His famous sermon in Matthew 5-7, Jesus tells us what it looks like to live a flourishing Kingdom life. He says that one of the things flourishing folks do is make peace. Kingdom people (or “sons of God” in Jesus’ words) are peacemakers (Matt. 5:9.)
Now, I know because of Jesus (and John 1:12 and Romans 8:15) that I’m a daughter of God. I’m a Kingdom person. That’s been settled on the cross, and my Savior’s beatitudes apply to me. So it should follow that I’m a peacemaker, correct? Reconciliation is something I should strive for as a child of God. I shouldn’t try to avoid conflict or rush through it, no - I should see it as an opportunity to make peace.
Peace, in biblical terms, isn’t just about the absence of conflict. It’s about completeness, wholeness - shalom. David encourages us to “turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it” (Ps. 34:14.) We should be running after peace - chasing it down. When we expend the energy to run after something, it’s usually important to us, right? David is saying that peace (wholeness, completeness) is worth the effort. We should want peace. Not because it makes our lives easier, but because it gets us closer to shalom. Closer to a flourishing life. Closer to Jesus.
Jesus, the-capital-S Son of God, is the great peacemaker. The SHALOM-maker. The reconciler. With His Spirit in us, we are like Him, and can make peace like Him. Sons of God - and daughters of God - are peacemakers. We have our Father’s character. What He pursues, we pursue.
So, how do we live into this identity? I’ve got three suggestions.
We welcome the Spirit.
Peace is a fruit of the Spirit’s work in our lives (Gal. 5:22). The more we welcome the Spirit into our hearts, thoughts, and decision-making, the more peace will grow. We can trust the Spirit to give us ample opportunities to practice peacemaking (ask me how I know.)
We pray for peace.
We can get on our knees for peace. We can pray regularly for reconciliation - in our homes, our families, our neighborhoods, our schools, our government, our workplaces and most especially in our churches. On this earth, we won’t always achieve peace, but we can long for it and regularly petition the Prince of Peace.
We move toward people.
We don’t have to run away from conflict. We can choose to move toward each other like God moves toward us. When a conflict arises in a relationship or among people in our communities, we can be the first ones to suggest reconciliation. We can resist the urge to avoid it and make genuine and humble apologies, when necessary. We can volunteer to accompany someone who is afraid to face it alone. Reconciliation can start with something as simple as a greeting and a little space for conversation.
Paul says, “if possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all” (Romans 12:18.) There will be times when we fight hard for peace, but it doesn’t come. Paul encourages us here to focus on the things that we can do to promote peace, and to trust the Spirit of Peace with the rest.
One day, we will enjoy true shalom in the presence of our Lord. Until then, daughters of God, we can make peace here on earth and help others to do the same. We can face conflict with hope. We can be known as peacemakers, in Jesus’ name.
Natalie Herr is the founder and team leader of Dayton Women in the Word. She is a servant of God, a wife, a mom of four and a God-sized dreamer. She loves teaching and equipping women with God's Word.