As an editor, one of my favorite verses has always been Hebrews 12:1-2. A section of it reads:

“Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses...let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross…”

You would think it would be the word “Author” that catches my eye, and while it does resonate with my editor-heart, the more striking word to me in these verses has always been the word “eyes.”

Eyes are a fascinating thing. You see, many days what my eyes are focused on is where my heart is focused. My bet is, you are similar. When you see a good sale, do you pine longingly for that treasured item? Or, like me, when you see fresh chocolate chip cookies or a mouth-watering steak, is that all your heart (or maybe your stomach) wants? Or, on a more serious note, when you stare deeply into the eyes of a loved one, does your heart soar with gratefulness?

This year, I’ve seen the truth of the saying ‘the eyes are a window into the soul.’ They show us where our focus is. To summarize Jesus’ words in Matt. 6:19-23, for where your eyes are fixed, there also will be your heart. But, the question I keep coming back to in pondering this word, eyes, is this: What are my eyes fixed on? Jesus, or other things?

the question I keep coming back to in pondering this word, eyes, is this: What are my eyes fixed on? Jesus, or other things?

I can honestly say it’s been a mixed year. There’s been a lot of change, transition, and questions this year - and my eyes have gotten diverted from Jesus more than a few times. It’s been a daily journey to keep turning away from other things and back to my King. But I praise God for His relentless pursuit and ever-beckoning call in my life. He continues to place measures of grace that enable me to keep fixing my eyes on Him.

One of the measures of grace He has used this past year was that of my volunteer role with the Dayton Women in the Word team. Serving as the Content Editor, I had the great privilege to help steward over many words this year. Words that informed, words that told stories, words that spoke life - words, ultimately, that we hope and pray gave God back some of the glory He is due.

I saw this role as an active practice of stewardship. A stewardship of truth. And through this role, I saw that God is the Steward over my life. I won’t lie to you, 2018 has been a hard, confusing year in many ways, but one thing I have definitely had is ample opportunity to choose to trust Him. Trust Him, even when I cannot see. Trust Him, even when I don’t have answers or specific direction. I’m learning, albeit slowly,  that this is what faith is, choosing to trust - not because you “get it all,” but because God is sovereign, good, and wise.

As a sermon I listened to recently reminded me, I’ve seen God say to me over and over again: “I didn’t ask you to have all the solutions, I asked you to have faith.” That is what this role has taught me - to have more faith. Faith that God can do abundantly more than I can ask or imagine. Faith that He uses broken people and situations for His glory. Faith that He can be trusted. Faith that He will do what He says He will do. Faith that He is faith-FULL, even when I fail in faith.

So, now as I close this chapter and move on to work on some other things the Lord is calling me to, I think about all that God has done in the past year through DWITW, and I am humbled. I’m humbled to have been to have taken part in this weighty work of stewarding truth - it has taught me once again to fix my eyes back on Jesus and choose to trust Him. This has been a true and pure gift.

My goal was always to lift high the name of Christ and to encourage other women to do the same. And I know  this is the goal of our new Content Editor, Stephani Duff. So, as I close this chapter, that is my encouragement to her and to you dear readers of the DWITW blog community: Fix Your Eyes on Jesus. He will never fade. He can be trusted with your yesterdays, todays, and tomorrows. He is a good Steward. He is a good Author and will continue perfecting you, growing you up into His likeness, for the sake of the gospel!

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Bekah Brewer wants to live in a world where travel is quicker & cheaper, people are wisely vulnerable, and where discipleship is not just a concept but a thriving heartbeat of the whole Church. When she’s not editing for DWITW or her business (Words Redeemed), you can find her playing soccer, pouring into friends & family, or planning out more times of fun, rest, and growth. Her favorite Scripture is Philippians 1:27a: Just one thing: Live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. (HCSB)

 Today’s team journal is written by our Bible Study Director, Lauren Steckling.

While I want to offer baskets full of gifts and talents, many times all God asks of me is a willing and open heart.

I’ve probably mentioned before that I am a “behind the scenes” person. I prefer to be out of the spotlight, away from the center of attention. I see myself as a “follower” - the kind of character who plays the supporting role as the people around her are doing big things. I like being able to carry out the details while someone else comes up with the visionary dream. Any time the word “leader” or “leadership” is mentioned I am quick to announce: “that’s not who God created me to be.”

here are my empty hands. Fill them with qualities that only You can. If they need me, I’m willing to learn.

The problem with all of that is that it is who I say that I am. It’s my comfort zone, my safe place. I don’t like being in charge so I shy away from good opportunities for growth. Why? Because growth is uncomfortable and it takes me away from my safe place. Throughout the last ten years or so though, God has gradually, and intermittently placed me in positions of leadership that continue to stretch me. And every single time it has been good for me. From management at work during college to teaching classrooms of little ones to, most recently, my position on the Dayton Women in the Word’s Director Team.

This last position, as Bible Study Director, has definitely been a season of stretching for me. It was just over a year ago that I joined the team, and it had been evident by the events leading up to my commitment that this was where God wanted me to be. I almost didn’t apply, because little ol’ Lauren is quiet, reserved, and doesn’t take initiative - and those just aren’t the qualities of a leader. Except... God thought otherwise.

Just before I was interviewed for the position I told the Lord:

“God, I am not qualified for this job. I have empty hands and a laundry list of excuses why they’d be better off with someone else. BUT, here are my empty hands. Fill them with qualities that only You can. If they need me, I’m willing to learn.”

I constantly have to remind myself of this and I continue to pray that God would equip me. He has answered my prayer up to this point and I know He will be faithful to continue to give what I need. In my DWITW 365 reading from today (Matthew 25), I recalled the lesson of the parable of the man who gives his servants bags of gold, or talents. Two of the three servants invested their money and earned more gold for the master. One, however, hid his bag of gold and earned nothing more. To the two wise servants, he said:

“Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; now I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!”
(Matt. 25:23)

God has been giving me small areas of leadership to be faithful in for a while now. He is proving to me that I have the ability to do good things for His glory, and as long as I am faithful in those small areas and trust Him to equip me with what I need, I can continue to trust Him to provide when He brings larger areas of leadership.

His call for me, and for you, is faithfulness and stewardship - not perfection. He has already shown us that He is the one in charge anyway. He is the true planner, provider and leader of Dayton Women in the Word and the Summer Bible Study. And oh, what a beautiful relief that is to me! He has already shown me once again that He is going before us and providing for Summer Study 2019 before we even have the chance to feel a need! I still feel unqualified and insecure at times, but the Lord is being glorified all the more because it cannot be said that any “success” is credited to me or my abilities - it is, and will always be, Him!

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 Lauren Steckling wants to live in a world where donuts have no calories, weekends last longer, and everyone would feel the grace and peace that comes knowing their Savior Jesus. When she's not taking care of her toddler, you can find her sewing, baking, or with her nose in a good book.

Her favorite Scripture is Isaiah 41:10, ESV: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Today’s team journal was written by our Finance Director, Christina Von Moll. 

I heard it said somewhere by someone that there are no coincidences when it comes to the things of God. When images and themes keep popping up in different circumstances it’s probably a good idea to pay attention. Lately for me, it’s been stones of remembrance. I’ve been studying Joshua with my local BSF class and our DWITW podcast live recording centered around women sharing testimonies of stones of remembrance in their lives. This coincidence led me to think about what stones I had to lay down in remembrance of all He has done in my life.

Here and now we can raise our thanksgiving to the Lord because there is so much to remember.

God saved me when I was a crushed and abused soul seeking worth in the attention and approval of the world. He used my brokenness to open my eyes to my need for a Savior. He used my less than ideal circumstances to stir my heart to desire the fullness of a life given over to that Savior. He opened my eyes to the reality of my spiritual depravity and for every lie that was struck down by the truth of His Word, a piece of my carefully curated mask was torn away. I started to run out of hiding places within myself and I was on the edge of complete surrender, complete trust, and completely finding my worth and identity in Him. This meant dying to the shame and broken mindset that was my default.

While teetering on the brink, I endured a confusing and toxic break up which fueled my fall back into shame. I was desperate to find rest in my old habits but quickly realized that it only lead to restlessness. I knew I was in rebellion and disobedient to the truth that had been so endearing to me. It was a dark season but God pursued me. He drew me in once again and I felt the call to repent of my disobedience and walk a new path. By the complete grace of God I met my husband during that bleak season. Four years and two amazingly beautiful kids later I can see His sovereign hand that brought me to this place. As I look back at what He’s done in my life, the disappointments and hardships I face now are put into perspective. God is completely and totally trustworthy and He will bring me through any trial.

“Here I’ll raise my Ebenezer
Hither by thy help I’m come”

These words from the famous hymn ”Come Thou Fount” resonate in my heart as I think on the testimonies He has written for me.

In the midst of disappointment, reversal, or any challenge we face. We can remember the grace of the Lord and His love over us. Whatever side of deliverance we may be on, whether He has called us to, through, or out of something we can raise our Ebenezer. With every stone, in every circumstance, we can thank the Lord for his lavish grace and faithfulness that has brought us right here. Here and now we can raise our thanksgiving to the Lord because there is so much to remember. Where we are matters and we should always remember the strength and the steadfast love of the Lord that brought us here. If you are going through difficulty, know that His faithfulness endures beyond any earthly circumstance and that this season is a light momentary affliction. One day as you look back it will be but another stone and testimony of His goodness. You’ll see how He used every circumstance to bring you here.

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Christina Von Moll wants to live in a world where coffee breaks are mandatory and kids actually sleep through the night. When she's not wrangling her two tiny children, you can find her binge-watching seasons of "The Office" or curled up with a good book and a cup of coffee.

Her favorite Scripture is 1 John 3:1-2, ESV.

September has rolled in and with it come the beginnings of change. Cooler breezes ruffle the trees. Frost tickles the edges of morning. Fall, in all of its multicolored glory, is imminent. The calendar on my kitchen wall testifies that summer has officially ended; and more than that, it has been a stalwart herald of hope in this season of fading warmth. Above its grid of numbered days extend a pair of watercolor red clovers accompanied by the words of Psalm 126:5:

“Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy!”

When I think of this I feel as though my current days are defined by the tears they garner - tears of frustration, of relief, of sadness, of hurt, of regret, of repentance. Oh, how I long for the days that carry an outcry of joy. But to reach these joyful days, I must sow and steward the tears of this season. I also I think of the Israelites, their way of life steeped in the art and work of agriculture, and I wonder what it meant for them ‘to sow in tears.’

In our readings for DWITW 365 this week, Psalm 126 follows the events of Ezra and Nehemiah. The exiles have returned to Jerusalem. The temple and city walls have been rebuilt. The Israelites and those who have separated themselves for the Lord (Neh. 10:28) have committed anew to the Mosaic covenant given on Mt. Sinai so many generations ago. The people have at last begun to truly remember who God is, what He has done, and all He said He would do. And this psalm is a lament to Him.

In the first three verses the psalmist recalls God’s restoration, faithfulness, and great deeds which have given gladness to the Israelite community. They had lost much in their lives due to their own wayward unfaithfulness to the God they had once said they knew. The Israelites were cast out from their families, their homes, and the very Promised Land they had received. And all this was to save their hearts from the veiled deceit and wickedness they had begun to nurture, and ultimately to turn their eyes back to the God who called them His own. Though weighted with sorrow, a lament need not be devoid of hope. And so this lament begins anchored in the fertile ground of joy-infused renewal, daring us to remember the dreamlike wonder of what it means to be restored (Ps. 126:1).

From the recollection of this mercy, comes an outflow of hopeful prayer: 

“Restore our fortunes, O Lord,
like streams in the Negev!
Those who sow in tears
shall reap with shouts of joy!
He who goes out weeping,
bearing the seed for sowing,
shall come home with shouts of joy,
bringing his sheaves with him.”
- Psalm 126:4-6

The psalmist compares the people to a desert region in southern Judah (the Negev) which he’s saying would flourish with vibrant plant life again, if its water-worn ravines were to be filled with streams once again. As I read this I feel arid places in my life - ones that I have tried to water with loving others well, keeping a tidy home, or being a good wife and mother. But these are things that are not meant to be my ultimate sources of life. These are things that are meant to flow from the ultimate Source of life, Christ Himself. I am not meant to fill the gullies that stand in my desert when I run dry, but instead I am to ask Jesus to fill them with His presence. I need the Living Water to fill and overflow these places.

And as I ask Him to prepare and tend the soil of my heart, I still need to go about the work that is mine to do. Because living is work. Relationships are work. And there is sowing to be done. So I pray and talk to the God who hears me when I cry out, the One who loves me better than I know. Therefore, I read His Word and linger and meditate on it to catch a better glimpse of Him than before. I listen for His Spirit to give direction to my steps.

Though I cannot control the seasons or the cycle of harvest, I know the God who does. And so I must rely on Him to do the work He has always done. It is the Lord who whispers to the seed when it is time for sprouting. It is by His prompting that the sun shines and the rain falls. It is by His hand that the work of transformation is done.

our eternity is meant to be spent in His glorious presence, making much of who He is and reveling in the joy of shouting His name as we come home.

So, whether you are feeling weighed down by sorrow, or bursting at the seams with shouts of joy, you need not pretend you are in any season other than the one you find yourself in. Fight to remember what is true. The truth is: That you, dear sister, are loved by the holy God that made you. And there is no one else that He would rather hear from or spend time with - He wants and desires you. You are precious to Him whether you are weeping or shouting and He is there with you in the midst of it. He is within you in the midst of it.

We cannot taste life without Jesus, just as a clover cannot grow or blossom without rain. We cannot flourish apart from the Author of life itself. We were made for Him. While we are not promised earthly days marked by ease or happiness, our eternity is meant to be spent in His glorious presence, making much of who He is and reveling in the joy of shouting His name as we come home.

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 Robin Zastrow wants to live in a world where coffee never gets cold and kindness abounds. When she's not discovering the wonders of construction paper and cardboard tubes with her two little ones, you can find her sneaking in another few pages of a book or jotting down bits of writing on scraps of paper.

One of her favorite Scriptures is:“Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you.” Psalm 33:20-22 ESV

Here we are with another 365 post….and friends, if you fell asleep reading all those genealogies throughout Chronicles, then this is your alarm clock!

There are times throughout the Biblical record where everything seems to stop. The authors press pause. They slow things down to retell the story of our God. It all feels very “meta-narrative,” or pointing to the grand story. I think God gives us these mic-drop summaries because He knew we would need some re-awakening. He graciously reminds us who He is and what He has done, because He knows that we, like the national of Israel, are quick to forget.

Psalm 78 is one such chapter, and Asaph is one such author, inspired by God. Asaph doesn’t just call his people to remember it, but to sing it. He calls his people to sing the anthem of their God.

The Endless Cycle

In Psalm 78 alone, there are over 50 direct references to God’s sovereign actions - these are actions of His provision, His protection, and His justice. This song reminds God’s people that He is in control, He alone is God, and that He is the main character of the story. How do the Israelites respond?

“In spite of ALL this they still sinned; despite His wonders, they did NOT believe.”
- Psalm 78:32

And God’s response to them? Compassion.

“Yet He, being compassionate, atoned for their iniquity and did not destroy them; He restrained His anger often and did not stir up all His wrath. He remembered that they were but flesh, a wind that passes and comes not again.”
- Psalm 78:38-39

We’ve heard this before, right? The Israelites’ sin, God confronts their sin, they see God’s goodness and then… they forget God and sin again. YET God still loves them, has compassion on them, and forgives them. It certainly points us to need for a more permanent solution - the need for a Savior.

Need for God’s Compassion

If you are as incredulous as I am at the immense testing God put up with from the Israelites, remember with me that we are just like them. We are now God’s chosen people! And we, too, need great compassion from God! Humbling, am I right? In Psalm 73, the psalmist goes through his own humbling process, from judging others to waking up to the reality that he, himself, was the brute beast to God. In verses 22-26, He cries:

“I was brutish and ignorant;
 I was like a beast toward you.
 Nevertheless, I am continually with you;
 you hold my right hand.
 You guide me with your counsel,
 and afterward you will receive me to glory.
 Whom have I in heaven but you?
 And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
 My flesh and my heart may fail,
 `but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

God’s compassion changes hearts back towards him. It changed the Israelites countless times, and it can change us today.

A “Nevertheless” Kind of God

I remember studying Nehemiah 9 last summer study, and finding yet another place God recounts His story to His people. Although it is another author and setting entirely, it is the same story—our compassionate God giving a nevertheless attitude to his unfaithful people. Nehemiah 9:31 reads: “Nevertheless, in your great mercies you did not make an end of them or forsake them, for you are a gracious and merciful God.”

On and on the cycle goes, in the Israelites’ story, and in our own. Throughout the genealogies in 1 Chronicles, we find generations of people in need of a deliverer, in need of a Messiah. God, in His mercy, gave them countless “nevertheless” moments. And we, too, might as well add our names to the lists. We, too, need a deliverer who can save us from ourselves. So the genealogies are not meaningless, but rather, they point us to the biggest nevertheless moment of all time...

Enter Jesus

You see, these genealogies focus heavily on David’s history, from the line of Judah, as well as they trace mankind all the way back to Adam. From these specific lines would come the only way for all of our “nevertheless” moments would come to pass—Jesus. As we now know, all of history hinges on Jesus life, death, burial, and resurrection. All generations salvation’ throughout time depend upon the promise of the Messiah.

Jesus’ death and resurrection makes it so that our story ends differently, once and for all.

In Matthew 1:1-17, the genealogy of Jesus is recorded back to Abraham, and in Luke 3:23-38, the genealogy of Jesus is recorded all the way back to Adam. You see, all these people in these genealogies had the same problem of sin, and cycled through the same story as the Israelites, BUT Jesus’ death and resurrection makes it so that our story ends differently, once and for all. He has saved us. He has atoned for our sin. He is victorious over our past, present, and future.

He has changed the story’s ending.

Throughout time and from generations long past, God had a great plan of redemption in mind - the greatest story of compassion and mercy. He always had Jesus in mind for you and for me, from the beginning. Jesus is the greatest plot twist of all time.

A Generation that Seeks God

What will the generations after ours say about us? What will be our legacy - one of cyclical sin OR of a broken dependence on our Savior? What story will the future genealogies tell?

So, sister, if you are asleep in your faith, retell the story of God! Tell of His everlasting love for you from generation to generation! Confess your arrogance and your wandering and come back to Jesus. Testify how He has turned you from brute beast and object of wrath to be precious children of Godand co-heirs with Christ! Let’s be a generation who proclaims His nevertheless kind of faithfulness, compassion, and mercy to ours and others wayward hearts.

So, with every moment of our lives, let’s sing a new song of Jesus’ love for us, and of gratefulness to the Author and Perfecter of our faith - Jesus!

“Oh God let us be
 A generation that seeks
 Seeks Your face
 Oh God of Jacob”
 - Give us Clean Hands, by Charlie Hall

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Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers.

“ “For the Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. He knows your going through this great wilderness. These forty years the Lord your God has been with you. You have lacked nothing.””

— Deuteronomy 2:7

Forty years. I am dumbfounded by that number. Forty years of wilderness. Forty years of not knowing when it would end. Forty years not knowing if what was promised would come to fruition. Forty years is a long time. I mean, if I can be frank, forty minutes can feel like an eternity at times. 

Living in a world that is fast paced and social media driven, we are not a generation who appreciates, or even understands, patience the way that we should. Instant gratification, confusing want with need, and praying when it’s only the most dire of situations and not because it is our privilege, these all seem to be too commonplace in our culture. Maybe you’re not guilty of those things, but we’re all friends here, right? So, I’m going to propose an honesty hour here...or maybe just forty minutes, to save us some time.

“And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness...He humbled you by letting you go hungry; then He gave you manna to eat...Your clothing did not wear out, and your feet did not swell these 40 years.”

- Deuteronomy 8: 2,3-4

I confuse want with need every single day. And I have lived through seasons where prayer looked more like pleading in that eleventh hour, and less like an ongoing dialogue between a girl and her Papa. And often, in the midst of those seasons, the lack of conversation and the deep-bellied grief over not getting something I wanted, was because I was confusing God for a genie who gives us what we always want rather than understanding Him as an all-knowing Savior who provides for us what we need.

He takes care of our needs, but oftentimes my prayers have looked like, Father God, I want more money for fun. I want to buy a new couch. I want to be able to save more. I don’t want to have to decide what “taxable items” are necessary this week.

This list could go on and on, as I am sure yours could too. These are things I want, but I have allowed myself to believe they’re what I need. As I read through Deuteronomy chapter 8, I hear the faint whisperings from my Papa who never leaves: Sweet girl, do you have a couch? Is there food in your fridge? Are your bills paid? Do you have trash bags? Can you take a couple rolls of toilet paper from your momma next time you’re at her house? The clear to answer to these whispers is yes. He has provided just what I need, in my time of need. And so, my litany of requests seems to grow faint as His voice grows stronger in my head.

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I remember the first time I was confronted with poverty that broke me from the inside out. It was my second trip to India, and my first time walking through an area slum with which Back2Back Ministries partners. Piles of trash lined the corridors of homes. Makeshift doors of metal were held up with rope or wiring. Collections of coconut shells were lined up and drying out in the heat of the sun. There were flies everywhere and barefooted babies running freely.

I remember not being able to decide whether I should choke from grief or laugh at the joy still found in the circumstances -- circumstances with which I will never be able to empathize. That day something shook loose in me. A continual reminder that, when complaining fights to leave my lips, I am not without. I am not in need. The list of things I take for granted is long and unforgivable. But God.

I always tell people it’s difficult to come back from India, or from any developing country because you stop being confronted with what so much of the world lacks. When I am in Ohio, sitting in my home with heat or air conditioning, with easy access to grocery stores to fulfill my needs, and driving a car that will not break down or fail me, I tend to lose sight of the streets of that slum. I tend to forget how I felt holding hands with the little girl who showed me her home. I need to remember “home” isn’t always four walls and a door. I forget. And I don’t want to be an ungrateful American millennial who believes she’s got it really bad, when in actuality, she’s never really been found in need.

Their God hasn’t forgotten about them, just as He never forgets about me.

I think about the little girls in that slum village weekly. Their hair wild and unkempt in the most stunning of ways, their dresses vibrant and cheerful, their little anklets with the bells that never stop ringing, because they never stop moving. They exhibited a joy founded in purity. Their homes may not look like mine, but they do have a place to sleep and eat with their families. Their parent’s jobs may not be what an American child grows up thinking about, but they are doing the best with what they have. Their God hasn’t forgotten about them, just as He never forgets about me.

And then I consider those Israelites in Deuteronomy. The ones I’d love to believe I’m so much better than. Forty years in the wilderness, with a whole lot of questions and doubts. I imagine myself scoffing at them and them raising their eyebrows back my way saying: “Oh, sure, girl. Because you rest in peace and blind trust every day, right?”

Then I realize I am the Israelite eating manna, and still asking for things I do not need right now. And God is still providing, but asking softly – “Do you really not have what you need, little one?” I am the girl who will always question, always push in seasons of want, feeling like I’ve been forgotten or overlooked, and thankfully Jesus is still my love who gently reminds me, “Your God has been with you. You have lacked nothing.”

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 Steph Duff wants to live in a world where every human, whether small or regular-sized, learns to use their voice and is seen and known. When she's not traveling and story telling with Back2Back Ministries, you'll likely find her drinking excessive cups of coffee, with her nose in a book, or daydreaming about India. Her favorite scripture is Habakkuk 1:5, and she prays for a world in which Jesus is the name on every lip. Learn a little more about her love for semi-colons, what stirs her blood, and the yearnings of her heart over at www.stephaniduff.wordpress.com.

It’s still winter. All over my Instagram, people are being taken down by the flu. Moms hold their breath as they check the school closing lists, and groan as they find out that school is closed, yet again. Things are kind of just blah in this season. I’ve noticed it in my own spirit, and in the spirits of those around me - a pattern of grumbling and complaining. This cranky vibe has vomited all over my kids, my social media, my husband, and my church. There is always something to grumble about, someone to vent to, and something to be bitter over. It is so commonplace, like a verbal filler. It quickly becomes our go-to subject during small talk. Is there anyone not complaining? And how’s it going in my own heart? Well, it could certainly win the ‘winter-blues-grumpy-pants’ award.

There is no in-between. . .
everything means everything

In the midst of this season, I have been teaching my three-year old son, Titus, Bible verses with ABC Scripture cards. The “D” verse is “do everything without complaining or arguing” (Philippians 2:14). The Holy Spirit has been bringing this to my mind often and using it to convict my heart. In my study, God has also been emphasizing to me every time He says words like “all,” “none,” “everything” or “nothing.” There is no in-between when God uses this language. When He inspired Paul to write these words “Do everything without complaining or arguing” to the church in Philippi, he picked the word “everything” on purpose. Everything means everything. Do everything without complaining or arguing. Paul did not write “Do some things without complaining or arguing” or “Do churchy things without complaining or arguing”; no, God says everything.

Now don’t get me wrong. I want the real, raw truth from you when I ask you how you are doing. And nowhere in the Bible does it say, “don’t have feelings” or “don’t be authentic,” but I’m learning through these Biblical narratives that there is a way to express these things and still proclaim trust in the Lord and dare I say, even worship Him. Remember Job? He hit the nail on the head when he said, “Though He slay me, I will trust in Him!” Job 13:15.

On the contrary, the Israelites in the account of Numbers 14 were not on the same wavelength - we find them complaining. They don’t like their food. They don’t like their living situation. They are downright scared of those giants living in the land God promised to them. And it is shocking to us, after all God has done for them, that they are still grumbling! At this point in the story, we have followed the Israelites’ incredible journey - saved from famine, saved from slavery, saved from disaster and saved from the tyrant pharaoh - and here, God makes a point of extending mercy to them yet again, but this time to save them from themselves.

And of the Israelites in this time, I ask: Is there anyone not complaining?

There are four outliers who choose another way: Aaron, Moses, Joshua and Caleb. These four leaders respond in a way that is completely refreshing. In Numbers 14:5-11, they take some drastic measures in the face of the Israelites complaints. Moses and Aaron fall on their faces. Joshua and Caleb tear their clothes and plead with the people. Moses then intercedes for his people before the Lord, despite their unworthiness, and as Moses prays, He reminds God of who He has shown Himself to be:

““The Lord is slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, forgiving iniquity and transgression, but he will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children, to the third and the fourth generation. Please pardon the iniquity of this people, according to the greatness of your steadfast love, just as you have forgiven this people, from Egypt until now.””

— Numbers 14:18-19

After this intercession, God shows mercy and pardon yet again. Because of Moses’ prayer, the people are spared; but sin still has consequences. So, what happens to the people who grumbled and complained? The people who had forgotten who their God was and what He had done for them? They have to face the fact that they will not see the Promised Land - that land which God promised overflows with milk and honey.

What made the outliers different? They remembered who God was! They believed in His promises and trusted Him! They used their tongues to intercede, to worship, and to proclaim God’s faithfulness! In fact, this is what God says about one of those outliers, Caleb: “But my servant Caleb, because he has a different spirit and has followed me fully, I will bring into the land into which he went, and his descendants shall possess it” (Num. 14:24).

You see, we can’t simply stop complaining, stop sinning by ourselves. No, we need a different spirit, and when He gives us His Spirit, God will replace that sinful way with righteous living, with behaviors that exemplify what it means follow God fully. He will change our hearts, minds, souls, everything in us, even and especially what we do with our tongues. His Spirit initiates (and will complete!) a change from the inside out. From the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks (Luke 6:45).

This brings us back to Philippians, where Paul pleads with the church of Philippi, in Philippians 2:12-18:

“Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling,  for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.  Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me.”

We will become the outliers, like Caleb and Paul, who chose to proclaim God’s faithfulness

He will change us. We will speak life! Why? Because we will hold fast to the word of life - which is Christ Himself. And that life will make us stand out, making us shine as lights in the world, in a crooked and twisted generation. We will become the outliers, like Caleb and Paul, who chose to proclaim God’s faithfulness! So now, we can use our new hearts to rejoice, to lift up the name of our faithful God, and to intercede for others who do not. 

Therefore, as we see in Numbers, yes, there are lasting consequences of sin. The Israelites who complained and who did not trust the Lord did not get to see the Promised Land -- just like there are felt consequences to our own sin of complaining. Yet, God in his mercy, through Jesus, freed us from paying the wages of sin, the ultimate consequence, death itself. The beauty of life in Christ is that just as there are lasting consequences of sin, there are also lasting consequences to living by the Spirit. Like Caleb, we will see God’s goodness in the Promised Land.

So my prayer today for myself and for you, is that God would help us to follow the Holy Spirit inside of us, who is always helping us to follow God fully, and when faced with the giants in our lives, we will immediately use our tongues to worship the Lord, rejoice, and proclaim that He is faithful and good.

Epilogue:

In Numbers, Caleb was forty years old when he was identified as a man who follows God fully because he trusted in God’s promises and feared the Lord over men. We will see on day 85 in our reading plan, in Joshua 14, that Caleb follows God fully for the rest of his life. At 85 years old, Caleb is still fighting battles for the Lord. 

How can you follow God fully today? I have such hope that if God’s spirit gave Caleb the ability to follow him fully for the rest of his days, that the Holy Spirit will give us the ability as well, with our tongues, with our hearts, with our relationships, with our jobs, with our choices, with our everything.

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Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers.