Today's team journal was written by our Team Lead, Natalie Herr.

““For the Lord is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.””

— Psalm 84:11

God does not withhold good things from us.
God does not withhold good things from me.
God does not withhold good things from those who are seeking Him.
With God, we have all we need.

In the past week, I’ve written all four of those phrases in the margins of my Bible. The repetition of my own reactions to Scripture caught my eye. When did I start believing the lie that God is withholding things from me?

Like any gal who’s been schooled a bit in Bible study, my first thought was to look up the original meaning of the Hebrew word for “withhold” used in Psalm 84:11. The Hebrew word is mana’ (not to be confused with the word manna (referring to bread), which coincidently, God did not withhold!) which means to hold back, keep from, refrain or deny.

When I look at my relatively easy, white American life - my ‘used to be dead but now alive’ life - how can I say that God has held anything back from me? How can I say that He’s denied anything good from me? What is it that I think He is actually keeping from me?

I’m not sure how to answer that question just yet, but I’m led back again to this truth: everything I have is from the Lord. EVERY. THING. Every single thing. It’s all been given to me. God didn’t keep me back from my mother’s womb in 1986. He didn’t keep me back from growing up and learning and living. He didn’t withhold my husband or my four children or my home or my community. And He, FOR SURE, did not keep his Son from me. He gave me the ultimate gift in Jesus that I didn’t even know I needed. Ironically, I didn’t know I needed Him partly because of all the other gifts that He gave to me were clouding my view of the Giver and my need for a Redeemer.

I think of the passage in Luke 11 where Jesus is talking about dads; how they’d never give their kid a scorpion instead of an egg, or a serpent instead of a fish. If good human dads give their kids good gifts, then how much more does our good God? How can I say He’s been keeping anything good from me? Jesus says to simply ask and that God, in turn, would be delighted to give me anything that aligns with His will for my life.

“Oh fear the Lord, you His saints, for those who fear Him have no lack! The young lions suffer want and hunger, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.”
- Psalm 34:9

God is all powerful, and He definitely has the power to withhold things. There is evidence of that all over Scripture and all over our lives. But if we believe God’s Word, we have to believe that the things He has kept away from us have been for our good and for our protection. Perhaps, if we spent more time looking at the gift of God himself instead of our lack of “good” things, we would see that this is absolutely true.

So yes, God is storing up good things. But He doesn’t keep them away from those who seek Him. He doesn’t deny good from us when we ask. He doesn’t have a heavenly storehouse of wonderful things that we can’t have. Because of Jesus, there’s no sign on any door in heaven that says, “Natalie can NOT come in.”

In response to all of this, I hear God asking me to STOP spending time thinking about things I don’t have or far-off dreams that are not yet realized. Instead I hear Him saying, “Enjoy what I have given you RIGHT NOW. Today. Enjoy ME. Seek ME.” I hear Him calling me to reflect Him by not withholding good things from others when it is within my power to do so (Proverbs 3:27). I hear Him telling me to name my desires and see if they honor Him; and when they do, to ask Him boldly for those good gifts, and then to get ready to watch Him work.

This is what I know with certainty: When my heart is aligned with His heart and when I am walking in His ways, I can ask Him for anything and believe that He will deliver.

He does not withhold good things from us.
He does not withhold good things from me.

I will repeat that refrain from now until eternity.

Lord, help me to believe what I know is true: that you don’t withhold good things from your kids and that everything I have here and now is very good. Grow gratefulness in me, stir up awe and wonder and fear of you deep down in my soul. Set my gaze squarely on you, and help me believe that you love me like a good dad. Help me notice the good things that you are giving me all day, every day. I want to bless Your Name always - not just when You give, but also when You take away (Job 1:21). You didn’t hold back from Your hungry Israelites and You, oh God, won’t hold back from me (Neh 9:20). Show me how to reflect Your nature in this way - by not withholding good from the people within my influence. Let Your generosity flow through me to others around me. Let it be so, in Jesus’ name! Amen!

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Natalie Herr is the founder and team leader of Dayton Women in the Word. She is a servant of God, a wife, a mom of four and a God-sized dreamer. She loves teaching and equipping women with God's Word.

““Know that the Lord, He is God! It is He who made us, and we are His; we are His people, and the sheep of His pasture.””

— PSALM 105:4

Belonging is a funny thing. From conception, I think, we all fight to belong. In the womb, we find a sense of belonging with our mother – she is the source of our food, our soft place to land, our sanctuary. What comes after birth, often feels like a drawn out case of trial-and-error where we try on different proverbial clothing. We have many attempts at finding where, and with whom, we “fit.” I think, on some deep, unseen level, we’re all yearning to really belong.

Media tells us we won’t belong without owning x, y, or z product or service. Society tells us we won’t belong if we don’t conform, in some form or fashion, to a belief system or practice of behavior. And in some circles, belonging does not actually begin without some sort of initiation. The world we currently live in would have us believe that belonging doesn’t actually happen naturally. Instead it is something we must earn, fight for, and that we have to prove ourselves worthy to belong.

God’s Word teaches us to rest in our belonging from the very beginning

On the contrary, God’s Word teaches us to rest in our belonging from the very beginning. In Isaiah 64:8 the Spirit-inspired prophet writes, “But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand.” And later in Ephesians 2:10 Paul tells us we are “His workmanship.” Also, David’s words in Psalm 139 remind us that our frames were “not hidden from You [God]. . .” So, when I think about belonging from a Biblical worldview, I think about being seen and known in ways that are wholly unique and deeply intimate.

I belong to my mom because I know what the sound of her heartbeat sounds like from the inside.

I belong to my family because they’ve stood beside me in every season, whether it was tumultuous or marked by sunshine.

And I belong to Jesus, because He knew the number of my days, the intensity of my heart, and the struggle of my insecurities...all before I ever took my first breath.

There is an intimacy incited with the idea of belonging. It does not mean ownership, instead it is two souls gazing on the other and silently acknowledging, “I know the darkness of the storms you walk through, and I’m still going to do my best to lay light down, and walk with you.”

Belonging means we hear, and we are heard.

And I don’t know about you, but I can get very caught up in believing I go unheard by God. I am a girl who likes her answers quick! I also find myself praying, “And if you can manage it, Jesus, give me the answer I want. Kgreatthanks.” And then when the answers take their time arriving, or they aren’t the answers I’m hoping for, I allow my anger to fly, asking God why He doesn’t listen and why He won’t answer.

Recently, I’ve started asking the Lord for very clear answers. I’ve prayed things like, “Make it so clear that there is NO way I can deny that it’s You, Papa.” And as time wore on, I began to think I was in the clear. He wasn’t saying move, so I thought I was supposed to stay. And that gave me a shaky unfounded relief.

Then an answer came. And it was undeniably Him. And yet all I felt was anger.

“God, I know I asked you to make it clear, but didn’t you hear how desperately I didn’t want this answer? You’re the God of the universe – you’re telling me you couldn’t pull some strings here and manage a little switcheroo?

In the midst of my anger, and of furiously journaling all the ways I was enraged and how I wanted Him to fix it, He did what He always does (no matter the amount of petulance I’m serving up) -- He showed up to remind me to Whom I really belong.

“But truly God has listened; He has attended to the voice of my prayer.”
- Psalm 66:19

I think the lesson I’m continually learning is that we cannot ask God for clear answers and yet not expect Him to deliver. Jesus is the kind of friend we all really hope for on this side of Heaven that often feels impossible to find. He will wholeheartedly, without hesitation, answer the questions we hand Him with the utmost honesty. He rushes in, even on the cusp of us having full-on tantrums, and says, “Hey! Kiddo, if I don’t want something for you, I will make it so that you will not have it – no matter how much the last parts of your soul yearn for it.”

But truly God has listened; He has attended to the voice of my prayer. Truly God has listened -- even when He answers differently than we want. Truly God has listened, even when He says move, and we don’t want to. Truly God has listened, even when we don’t hear Him in our timeline. Truly God has listened, because He is God. And we are His. We belong to Him first and foremost.

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Steph Duff wants to live in a world where every human, whether small or regular-sized, learns to use their voice and is seen and known. When she's not traveling and story telling with Back2Back Ministries, you'll likely find her drinking excessive cups of coffee, with her nose in a book, or daydreaming about India. Her favorite scripture is Habakkuk 1:5, and she prays for a world in which Jesus is the name on every lip. Learn a little more about her love for semi-colons, what stirs her blood, and the yearnings of her heart over at www.stephaniduff.wordpress.com. 

Sleep has been an elusive companion as of late. My mind thrums with growing to-do lists and worries of if I am trying hard enough or accomplishing enough, fearful something will be forgotten over the course of the night. It turns out that amid the worry and fear, I have indeed forgotten much. I have forgotten who God is and, subsequently, who I am. It is in the midst of my forgetfulness that I have been both confronted and comforted by the words of David found in Psalm 103.

“The Lord is merciful and gracious,
slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
He will not always chide,
nor will he keep his anger forever.
He does not deal with us according to our sins,
nor repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.”
‭‭- Psalms‬ ‭103:8-13‬

In the face of God’s steadfast and unwavering love, I realized I have been longing for control rather than the peace of His presence and trying to rest in assurances I can hold in my hands rather than those I can hold in my heart. I am putting my fear and attention in the wrong place. I have foolishly been fixating on what-if’s rather than what is. What is, is the Lord. Though circumstances have changed, God has not. He is the same loving and fierce and gracious and holy Creator that He has always been and always will be.

In our readings for DWITW 365, Psalm 103 falls between the death of Saul and the anointing of David as king over all of Israel. David exhorts his soul to praise the Lord for His merciful forgiveness, His unrelenting love, and His ultimate kingship over all creation. In a time when David’s thoughts could have been consumed by the struggle around him or the prospect of resolution, he turns his focus to the everlasting — to the God that sustains him, to the God that made him, to the God that loves him.

God has declared a forever love for temporary people

In verses 15 and 16 David reminds us of our temporal nature, “as for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more.”  It is this innate transience of humanity juxtaposed to the eternal nature of God’s affection that coaxed my mind upward. God has declared a forever love for temporary people. God’s love for us has existed and will continue to exist beyond the limits of our lifetimes. 

My days are short and measured. They have a number to them, though I do not know what it may be. I can spend these days encumbered by anxious planning and preparation or I can fight to look beyond the ebb and flow of chaos. My surety lies not in where my feet fall but in where my mind and heart are planted. They need to be deeply rooted in the truth and love of God, in the place that cries out, “bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits…” (Psalm 103:1-2)

As we carry on into the week ahead, I pray that like David we would call to mind the benefits our God has been so gracious to extend, that His goodness would press us to praise, that His peace would quell our hidden fears, and that our hearts would be ignited by the remembrance of His steadfast love.

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Robin Zastrow wants to live in a world where coffee never gets cold and kindness abounds. When she's not discovering the wonders of construction paper and cardboard tubes with her two little ones, you can find her sneaking in another few pages of a book or jotting down bits of writing on scraps of paper.

One of her favorite Scriptures is:
“Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you.” Psalm 33:20-22 ESV

Today’s team journal was written by our Finance Director, Kaitlyn Carl. 

““I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.””

— Romans 12:1

I had always considered myself a pretty selfless person. In high school and college, I remember largely putting the needs of others before my own, sometimes even to my detriment. I even thought highly of myself for thinking so little of myself. Funny how sin can twist even a seemingly right action and mindset and turn it into ugly, life-sucking pride.

Then, I got married. And, oh, how my selfish nature started to truly reveal itself. Now, three kids later, I often feel that I don’t have a self-less bone in my body. Often, I would rather lay in bed than get up and tend to the crying baby; I would rather sit and read a book than play tea party for the 400th time; I would rather order takeout than spend time to make dinner. And the list goes on and on.

“The problem with a living sacrifice is that it keeps crawling off the altar.”
- D.L. Moody

In many ways, I’ve fallen prey to the warning from the very next verse in Romans 12:2a: “Do not be conformed to this world…” I’ve bought into the lie that my life is about me. But it’s just that: a lie. As a believer, I’m called to reflect my Savior, and Jesus did not come to this world as a tiny baby because He was thinking about Himself. Paul reminds us in Philippians that “...though He was in the form of God, [He] did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but He emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Phi. 2:6-8). And why did Jesus die this death on a cross? It certainly wasn’t for Himself. It was for me and for you. So, how can I sit here and live a single second of my life for myself?

If Jesus willingly emptied Himself and humbled Himself for my sake, how much more should I empty myself and humble myself for the sake of my Lord? Jesus presented His body as a real sacrifice (Hebrews 10:12); I’m called to present my body as a living sacrifice. To do that, I’ve got to tear down the idol of “me.” And that is hard and painful. I’ve been building up this idol my whole life, and it’s strong, large, and well-established. It’s like the house of bricks in the story of The Three Little Pigs -- it’s going to take a lot more than just huffing and puffing to blow this idol down.

Praise God that He is the foreman of this demolition project! He is stronger, bigger, and more established than my self-made idol because He is the One who is not made but always was and is (Psalm 90:2). And God’s orders’ hold more magnitude than that of the Big Bad Wolf, for by the power of His words and His breath He created the world and gave life to Adam (Genesis 1:1-2:7).

But I, I have to let Him work. I have to willingly allow His chisel to chip away at the hard edges of my heart. I have to open myself to be confronted with (and then address) my sins, to give up what I want and embrace what He requires and desires for my life. I have to stop living for the glory of “me” and start living for the glory of God. I know I won’t do it perfectly; I’ll have to continually be drawn back to this place of sacrifice. But you know what? God knows that. And that’s why He sent Jesus. Because He didn’t crawl off of His sacrificial table. And because He didn’t, I can keep crawling back onto mine.

“For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.”
-Romans 11:36

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Kaitlyn Carl wants to live in a world where kids always sleep in on the weekends and houses clean themselves. When she's not volunteering in some sort of ministry capacity or taking care of her family, you can find her reading or sleeping.

Her favorite Scripture at the moment is Romans 8:35, 37-39, ESV: "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? ... No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Here we are with another 365 post….and friends, if you fell asleep reading all those genealogies throughout Chronicles, then this is your alarm clock!

There are times throughout the Biblical record where everything seems to stop. The authors press pause. They slow things down to retell the story of our God. It all feels very “meta-narrative,” or pointing to the grand story. I think God gives us these mic-drop summaries because He knew we would need some re-awakening. He graciously reminds us who He is and what He has done, because He knows that we, like the national of Israel, are quick to forget.

Psalm 78 is one such chapter, and Asaph is one such author, inspired by God. Asaph doesn’t just call his people to remember it, but to sing it. He calls his people to sing the anthem of their God.

The Endless Cycle

In Psalm 78 alone, there are over 50 direct references to God’s sovereign actions - these are actions of His provision, His protection, and His justice. This song reminds God’s people that He is in control, He alone is God, and that He is the main character of the story. How do the Israelites respond?

“In spite of ALL this they still sinned; despite His wonders, they did NOT believe.”
- Psalm 78:32

And God’s response to them? Compassion.

“Yet He, being compassionate, atoned for their iniquity and did not destroy them; He restrained His anger often and did not stir up all His wrath. He remembered that they were but flesh, a wind that passes and comes not again.”
- Psalm 78:38-39

We’ve heard this before, right? The Israelites’ sin, God confronts their sin, they see God’s goodness and then… they forget God and sin again. YET God still loves them, has compassion on them, and forgives them. It certainly points us to need for a more permanent solution - the need for a Savior.

Need for God’s Compassion

If you are as incredulous as I am at the immense testing God put up with from the Israelites, remember with me that we are just like them. We are now God’s chosen people! And we, too, need great compassion from God! Humbling, am I right? In Psalm 73, the psalmist goes through his own humbling process, from judging others to waking up to the reality that he, himself, was the brute beast to God. In verses 22-26, He cries:

“I was brutish and ignorant;
 I was like a beast toward you.
 Nevertheless, I am continually with you;
 you hold my right hand.
 You guide me with your counsel,
 and afterward you will receive me to glory.
 Whom have I in heaven but you?
 And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
 My flesh and my heart may fail,
 `but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

God’s compassion changes hearts back towards him. It changed the Israelites countless times, and it can change us today.

A “Nevertheless” Kind of God

I remember studying Nehemiah 9 last summer study, and finding yet another place God recounts His story to His people. Although it is another author and setting entirely, it is the same story—our compassionate God giving a nevertheless attitude to his unfaithful people. Nehemiah 9:31 reads: “Nevertheless, in your great mercies you did not make an end of them or forsake them, for you are a gracious and merciful God.”

On and on the cycle goes, in the Israelites’ story, and in our own. Throughout the genealogies in 1 Chronicles, we find generations of people in need of a deliverer, in need of a Messiah. God, in His mercy, gave them countless “nevertheless” moments. And we, too, might as well add our names to the lists. We, too, need a deliverer who can save us from ourselves. So the genealogies are not meaningless, but rather, they point us to the biggest nevertheless moment of all time...

Enter Jesus

You see, these genealogies focus heavily on David’s history, from the line of Judah, as well as they trace mankind all the way back to Adam. From these specific lines would come the only way for all of our “nevertheless” moments would come to pass—Jesus. As we now know, all of history hinges on Jesus life, death, burial, and resurrection. All generations salvation’ throughout time depend upon the promise of the Messiah.

Jesus’ death and resurrection makes it so that our story ends differently, once and for all.

In Matthew 1:1-17, the genealogy of Jesus is recorded back to Abraham, and in Luke 3:23-38, the genealogy of Jesus is recorded all the way back to Adam. You see, all these people in these genealogies had the same problem of sin, and cycled through the same story as the Israelites, BUT Jesus’ death and resurrection makes it so that our story ends differently, once and for all. He has saved us. He has atoned for our sin. He is victorious over our past, present, and future.

He has changed the story’s ending.

Throughout time and from generations long past, God had a great plan of redemption in mind - the greatest story of compassion and mercy. He always had Jesus in mind for you and for me, from the beginning. Jesus is the greatest plot twist of all time.

A Generation that Seeks God

What will the generations after ours say about us? What will be our legacy - one of cyclical sin OR of a broken dependence on our Savior? What story will the future genealogies tell?

So, sister, if you are asleep in your faith, retell the story of God! Tell of His everlasting love for you from generation to generation! Confess your arrogance and your wandering and come back to Jesus. Testify how He has turned you from brute beast and object of wrath to be precious children of Godand co-heirs with Christ! Let’s be a generation who proclaims His nevertheless kind of faithfulness, compassion, and mercy to ours and others wayward hearts.

So, with every moment of our lives, let’s sing a new song of Jesus’ love for us, and of gratefulness to the Author and Perfecter of our faith - Jesus!

“Oh God let us be
 A generation that seeks
 Seeks Your face
 Oh God of Jacob”
 - Give us Clean Hands, by Charlie Hall

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Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers.

Last week’s reading of Scripture led us through 1 Samuel 16, where we were introduced to one of the most well-known and influential characters of the Bible: David. In 1 Samuel 16, the prophet Samuel is sent to Jesse of Bethlehem to anoint one of his sons as king. Of course, God chooses the son that no one would suspect of being king: the young shepherd boy, David. After such a deliberate and intentional choosing, it would be easy to assume that God is ready to put His chosen one on the throne automatically. However, a close study of Scripture tells us that the time between David’s anointing and his kingship is fifteen years! It isn’t until 2 Samuel 5 that David actually steps onto the throne and is acknowledged as the King of Judah.

Those of us who are familiar with the stories of the Bible may find it easy to merely skim over these years as just simply a few chapters in the Bible. David knew that he was going to be King. Those in his armies knew that he was going to be King. And yet...he was not king - for 15 years!

David sought to declare God’s goodness and His sovereign timing

In fact, he is very much the opposite of the king. He is a refugee fleeing for his very life from the land and the people that he was promised that he would rule over. And, in the pages of God’s Word, we find many of David’s recorded Psalms (or songs) that were written during his time of waiting to take the throne.  During his long years of waiting, David showed consistent steadfast faith in God and His ability to fulfill His promises. Through these recorded Psalms, we get to see a beautiful window into David’s heart.

First, David acknowledges his honest feelings during this time of waiting and seeking refuge - feelings of longing, fear, and a declaring of his need for God to show up (Ps 7:1-2; Ps 31:9-13; Ps 56:1-2; Ps 120). During this time, David sought to declare God’s goodness and His sovereign timing (Ps 31:19-20; Ps 54:6-7). In fact, instead of always focusing on himself and how he felt, He spent time praising God and focusing on His good attributes (Ps 34; Ps 142:5; Ps 63; Ps 124). Even after acknowledging his own feelings and circumstances (that are often less than ideal), David continues on with an attitude of thankfulness (Ps 7:17, Ps 56:3-4). And in those times of despair, David remembers to that his  refuge is ultimately found in the Lord (Ps 27, Ps 31; Ps 56:3-4; Ps 17:15). Finally, he boldly  asks the Lord for deliverance from his afflictions (Ps 35; Ps 123).

I cannot imagine what this time of waiting must have felt like for David. I am sure that there were days when it was easy for him to praise God and acknowledge His promises. However, I’m sure, there were other days that were difficult and full of affliction. Throughout all these ups and downs, we can see from his writings and the history found in Samuel, that David remained faithful to God and steadfast in his worship of Him.

While we all wait for things now, are we choosing to acknowledge our feelings, but ultimately declare God’s sovereignty over our situations?

As believers, we can relate with David’s struggle of waiting. We, like David, have been given a fulfillment and a promise. While David’s fulfillment was anointing, our fulfillment is salvation through David’s eventual heir - Jesus Christ (Hebrews 2:8-9). David’s promise was eventually taking the throne, while our promise is being freed from the shackles and bonds of sin that bind us - both now and once for all when Christ returns (1 John 3:2). 

We can also relate to David on a more personal note. What are you waiting for, right now, in this life? Maybe you are longing for a husband, a baby, or a friend. Maybe you are waiting for a broken relationship to be healed, or a job to be provided. While we all wait for things now, are we choosing to acknowledge our feelings, but ultimately declare God’s sovereignty over our situations? Are you spending time continuing to praise God? Do you have an attitude of thankfulness, or are you choosing to grumble and complain? Are you taking refuge in the Lord, or in other earthly, fleeting “fulfillments” of this life? In these times of waiting, may our attitudes look more like David’s attitude, who, in his time of waiting, penned these words in Psalm 27: “I am certain that I will see the Lord’s goodness in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart be courageous. Wait for the Lord.”

Suzanne Hines wants to live in a world where sunflowers bloom in eternal summer, where her children play instead of argue and where her family has an endless budget for travel. When she's not loving her husband, training and teaching her three children, and spreading education on the foster care system, you can find her writing, reading or running outside!

Her favorite Scripture is Romans 12:12 "...be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer..." (NIV)

Today's team journal was written by our Social Media Manager, Kelly Gwin.

You know, the song by Cory Asbury? (If not, check it out on YouTube here.)

It's possible that many of you have had this anthem blaring in your car speakers since it came out in January, and while its proven to be slightly controversial, it has been the declaration of my heart, and recent theme song of my life. The word “reckless” has negative connotations if we’re going to get technical, but this word seems to capture the ferocious intensity of the love of God that has recently been revealed to me in a whole new way. This is a unique love that only comes from a good and perfect Father. A Father who is willing to go farther than we could ever imagine to come after His own.

A few weeks ago, (via circumstances obviously ordained by God) I was blindsided by sin from my past that I had completely forgotten about. Yes, forgotten sin. A hidden mountain of events and deeds (mine and others’) came down unexpectedly and felt as if it were pressing me down into the depths of the sea; it was dark and heavy. I was confronted with memories of things that I had pushed down deep. Things I would promptly shake out of my mind whenever they tried to float to the surface. I knew they were there, but they had found their home in a secret hole in my heart, far away from the light of day, and in some subconscious way I had reckoned them untouched by the blood of Jesus. This lie resulted in a long struggle with worthlessness, fear, trust issues, and condemnation that was only piling up with every new failure and weakness in my life. I believed the Gospel. I loved Jesus. But this secret collection of sin I kept almost subconsciously from the Lord was keeping me in bondage. An accuser in the back of my mind kept saying, “He didn’t pay for THOSE things.”

“He sent from on high, he took me;
 he drew me out of many waters.
 He rescued me from my strong enemy
and from those who hated me,
 for they were too mighty for me.
 They confronted me in the day of my calamity,
 but the Lord was my support.
 He brought me out into a broad place;
 he rescued me, because he delighted in me.”
 - Psalm 18:16-19 ESV

Sometimes grace and mercy looks like pain and process. My heavenly Father carefully and intentionally prepared my heart for this season. He knew it would hurt. He knew I would need to bring these things to people I love dearly, so that we could come into greater unity and understanding of barriers and struggles that, beforehand were perplexing and unexplainable. But the lyrics of the song ring true to those who have been through a process like this, “There's no shadow you won’t light up, mountain you won’t climb up, You're coming after me.”

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
- 1 John 1:19 ESV

God knew it would hurt. He knew it was worth it. He went down into the deepest depths of my past, and brought to the surface the ugly things that I didn't want to acknowledge, and showed me the truth - His truth. He lead me to the cross, and showed me that those secret sins were there -  not on my back, but on the back of my Savior. He willingly shed His blood for every single one. Attempting to hide from them was only robbing me of experiencing the fullness of His love for me. He bought me - all of me. He knew exactly what He was purchasing, and He doesn’t regret it. He is not ashamed to be called my God.

So, I held onto His hand, and let Him take me to places I didn’t want to go, which included confiding in my husband and in my community. I was received with grace and understanding, and found that holding back was only serving to keep me from experiencing the fullness of love in those contexts as well. This “holding back” was not done intentionally, but I do admit that I had convinced myself that things that happened before my life in Christ didn’t matter to Him, or to others. I clung to the truth that I’m a new creation and moved on. While accepting my new identity is vital to abundant life, I realize now that it’s only when we are willing to get low, in the muck and mire of our sin, that the Gospel is magnified in our lives the way that it should be. As the song lyrics say:

There's no shadow You won't light up
 Mountain You won't climb up
 Coming after me
 There's no wall You won't kick down
 Lie You won't tear down
 Coming after me

So I’ve learned to confront my sin and failures head on, past and present, no matter how deep or vile, and sing the song of my Father’s love for me. This is freedom. Fully known and fully loved. Dark shadows being lit up by the grace and mercy of a God who wants me to know the depths of His love. I carry the truth of the Gospel in my heart each day as I continue to grow, mature, fail, and fall. I am now living aware of the glorious fact that EVERY one of my sins is covered by the blood of Christ. Therefore, I am not heaping new condemnation onto myself when I fail. That is not possible for a child of God. I am reminded that when we sin, we are just seeing more and more things that He died for. “It is finished.” The mountain is gone. I mourn and grieve and repent, but then I rejoice and walk in “the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God.”

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.
- Romans 8:1-4 ESV

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Kelly Gwin wants to live in a world where deep heart-talks happen at the top of every hour (you know, ones where everyone cries), gardens thrive without effort, and all the walls are white. When she's not discipling her 3 young girls and trying to keep her coffee hot, you can find her serving and living life with her Faith Christian Fellowship Dayton family, listening to some sort of podcast, or being "social" on behalf of DWITW.

Her favorite Scriptures are: Psalm 86:8 and Romans 5:8.

Not many days go by when I don’t second guess or question what God could possibly do with little ole’ me in His amazing kingdom filled with people much more qualified than I. In these moments of self-doubt, I’ve recalled stories of people like Noah, Moses, David, or even of Naomi and Ruth.

In questioning God of my own worthiness, He gently, yet boldly, reminds me of many places He has already used me for His perfect purposes. Note, not my perfect qualifications, but His perfect purposes. Take, for example, my job. I get cranky. I have moments where I would just as well throw my keyboard out the window rather than type another figure into a spreadsheet (I have been told I even have a “back away slowly from my desk” look). While not highly proud of this, the reality is, in the heat of normal workday stress, sometimes, my “Jesus Freak” positive attitude gets left at the copier.

God doesn’t need the strongest people to defeat the Giants. He only needs the willing.

Despite this, people know I am a Jesus-loving, God-fearing girl. Because I tend to live life wild and free, the raw vulnerability I typically display has brought people to me for prayer needs, to talk, and has even opened the door for three families to regularly attend church with me. I have been told by people my willingness to share, as raw and unrefined as it may be at times, is refreshing, tending to draw people in. Which is funny because I often feel as if I am walking around like Pig Pen from the Peanuts - swirled, not with dirt, but chaos.

I’ve discovered along the way God doesn’t need the strongest people to defeat the Giants. He only needs the willing. And I am certainly willing! The funny thing is, when I feel frustrated or angry, wanting to look for another job (the way the Israelites wanted to flee Goliath), inevitably, someone at the office says “I want to go to church with you!” Say what!? I proceed to pull my ‘Jesus Freak’ back out of the paper jam and get to share my love of God, but more importantly about HIS love for us. Back at my desk, I look to the heavens, laughing at God’s way of saying: “Nope! Sit still girlie, I’m not done with you here!”

I think David can relate. In 1 Samuel 17:45, David says to Goliath “you come against me with sword, spear and javelin but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied!” The Message version is a little more exciting, but I’ll spare you most of the details. In this version David phrases it: “The God of Israel‘s troops, whom you curse and mock!” And in verse 46 this version goes on to say “this very day God is handing you over to me…”

In our day to day, how often do we believe we are showing up with a few stones to throw when the enemy is armed with nuclear weapons? But it doesn’t matter. We are not powerful because of our own defenses or weaponry. We are powerful because of the Leader of our army! What matters in the moments of trial is our willingness to call on and obey God - He will hand over our enemy. It doesn’t matter if we are armed with a javelin, a bazooka, or a cold chicken nugget from our kids’ lunch. He. Will. Hand. Over. Our. Enemy! It is as simple as that.

we are not powerful because of our own defenses or weaponry.
we are powerful because of the leader of our army! 

As I read the story of David and Goliath, I was reminded of Saul wanting to protect David. He insisted on placing his armor on him. David tried to maneuver around a little with this armor. But it was too big for him. He struggled to move easily or properly. He shed the armor, saying instead, that he would enter this fight with God.

This passage became glaringly evident to me tonight as I visited a dear friend in the hospital. We were praying before she was transported to another hospital and in prayer, I was reminded of David walking around awkwardly in this armor unfit for him - an armor the world believed he needed to wear. David was adamant though that God was his protector. The same way my precious friend is adamant God is her healer! The same way she believes the doctor reports she receives have little to do with her defeating cancer! To be perfectly honest, I can’t say I would have shed the armor. I think I would’ve figured out a way to work with it. I don’t know if I’m brave enough to go against the “giants” with nothing but a couple of rocks. I wish I could say I were, but I’m not positive. Luckily, I don’t have to face a literal giant. But I do have to face struggles that seem gigantic. When they come calling, what am I armed with? Am I walking around awkwardly in that unfit armor? Or am I grabbing a couple of stones and saying ‘God‘s got this’?  

As I write this, I question my own logic. Why do we make things so difficult for ourselves? We just need to shed that armor, pick up a couple of rocks & slay the giant! What causes us to question the simplicity of that course of action? Is it pride? Lack of trust? For me, I guess, it depends on the circumstances but it may be a combination of both.

I guess what this story means to me is this: When my day is trying to get the best of me, when I’m trying to slay a giant, when I’m fighting to keep my head above water, when I need to not use my back away from my desk look, I should come to realize that it’s really not about me. It’s about giving that moment back to God. It’s about letting my Almighty protector take over that, and every, situation. God wants to be part of every single detail of my day. He wants to be part of which rock I pick up to the slay the giant. He wants to be part of my day not going well. He wants us to talk to him about our fears, hopes, desires, dreams, even frustrations. Because God is the God of the details - big or small. And that ladies, is what I believe we need to know about being a David in a world full of Goliaths.

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Sonya Gentry wants to live in a world where being kind and loving means that when we encounter a need or brokenness, we say yes first and think about it second. This would be a world where walking with Jesus means trying to act like Jesus through loving, relevant acts of service; where Christians put their hands and feet in the dirty situations of the world in order to show people God’s love and grace; where we understand that comfort zones are meant to be broken because people need us to show up and be be the best portrayal of God’s love we can be. When she's not working, you can find her being silly with friends and family, playing games with her nephews, volunteering for various organizations and events with her church, or relaxing with a movie. 

Her favorite Scripture is John 15:16-17: “You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you and I have appointed and placed and purposefully planted you, so that you would go and bear fruit and keep on bearing, and that your fruit will remain and be lasting, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name [as My representative] He may give to you. This [is what] I command you: that you love and unselfishly seek the best for one another” (AMP).

Today’s team journal was written by our Content Director, Jillian Vincent.

I’ve been swallowed in a book this past week, and for once I don’t mean I’m reading a book. This time I mean I am writing a book.

I’ve been afraid to come out and share that I’m writing a book, because I want some sense of my dignity preserved if it comes to nothing. The “what if’s” have been my all-too familiar friend: What if I’m not good enough? What if it fails and then I have to tell people that I failed? The thing is I’m so scared to be bad at something, and I’m especially embarrassed to be bad at that something I’m doing in public. I mean come on, I’ve taken the title of Content Director, have I not? Aren’t I supposed to be leading by example in producing beautiful content? Talk about pressure!

So, in response to this pressure, each day, I’ve prayed that God would help me to be faithful to what He has called me to write, and I understand now more than ever that writing is worship when done unto the Lord. In Colossians 3:23-24, Paul directs us with these words: “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” Therefore, I’ve asked God to help me write for an audience of one, and not to allow any voices or outcome, real or imagined, keep me from worshipping Him with my writing. So, day by day, God is consecrating my words as worship unto Him and making my writing process a holy one.

David’s public worship started with private worship.

In our DWITW 365 reading plan, we will come to a story about King David and his wife, Michal, recorded in 2 Samuel 6:16-22 and 1 Chronicles 13-15. When the ark of the Lord comes into the city of David, he and “all Israel were celebrating before God with all their might, with song and lyres and harps and tambourines and cymbals and trumpets” (1 Chronicles 13:8).  The Scriptures record that David specifically was leaping and dancing before the Lord. He holds nothing back, and unashamedly praises God.  The Scriptures record that Michal despised David in her heart because of the unabashed nature of his worship. The abundant disdain from Michal’s heart overflowed to her mouth (Luke 6:45), as she scolded her husband, the king of Israel.

What was David’s response to her?

“It was before the Lord, who chose me above your father and above all his house, to appoint me as prince over Israel, the people of the Lord—and I will celebrate before the Lord. I will make myself yet more contemptible than this, and I will be abased in your eyes.” 2 Samuel 6:21-22b

David basically says: Dignity be damned. The Lord is worthy!

May I lead in just this way! May I be  willing to openly, unashamedly worship God in every word and deed because He is worthy to be praised! So yes, I am writing a book! It’s about Jesus and it is my loud, uncensored, unedited, unpracticed, unprofessional, UNDIGNIFIED offering of worship to the Lord!

Scripture gives us the lyrics of the song David sung that day:

“Sing to the Lord, all the earth! Tell of his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous works among all the peoples! For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and he is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the peoples are worthless idols, but the Lord made the heavens. Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and joy are in his place. Ascribe to the Lord, O families of the peoples, ascribe to the Lord glory and strength! Ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name; bring an offering and come before him! Worship the Lord in the splendor of holiness.” 1 Chronicles 16:23-29

Whatever form your worship takes, let us lead by example and give the Lord the worship due His name..

May we fear the Lord over our gods of self, our good name, and the good opinion of our friends, family, and yes, even spouses! May we bring Him our offerings of worship! May we ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name in everything He calls us to do today, whether it is writing a book, meeting with your boss, or cleaning your fridge!

It doesn’t matter so much what we do as how we do it. Whatever form your worship takes, let us lead by example and give the Lord the worship due His name. Let’s worship the Lord in broad daylight! I’m trying to learn from David a habit of bold worship and learn from Michal’s mistake not to squelch the worship of others. In my life, I’m my own worst Michal. I squelch my own worship with inward shame, grappling with ugly predictions about what others may think of my bold worship.

So, I will leave you with this word of encouragement if you are feeling more like Michal than David. Has your passion maybe fizzled a bit? Maybe your worship is a little ho-hum or is hiding behind your pride? Just as Michal’s disdain overflowed from her heart, David’s worship overflowed from his. Earlier in his song, David’s lyrics declared “Sing to him, sing praises to him; tell of all his wondrous works! Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice! Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!” (1 Chronicles 16:9-11)

David’s public worship started with private worship. So, sisters, if you are afraid or ashamed to worship God out in the open, start by worshipping and seeking God in your own heart. When you see His glory and His character, you just won’t be able to help yourself. You will have to worship. You won’t be able to contain it, nor will you want to! The veil covering your worship, and God’s glory, will be removed.

“”But when one turns to the Lord, the veil is removed. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.””

— 2 Corinthians 3:16-18

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Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers.

The story of Gideon resounds with the symphony of the gospel. Gideon's’ story portrays the reality of an upside down kingdom - where God sent the weakest, most unassuming man to an oppressed people who needed a Savior in order that they might enter into fellowship with Him!  

Gideon’s life not only reflects the meekness of the Lamb of God, but also the fierceness of the Lion of the tribe of Judah.

Ironically, Hebrews 11 starts the famous “hall of faith” with this man, Gideon. However, when we delve into the actual storyline of his life in Judges 6-9, where we find the record of his life, he is frightened and insecure, hiding in a winepress in order to do the job of threshing. Why was he hiding? Simply put: he was afraid - he was hiding so that the enemy armies would not plunder his meager lot of rations. It is easy to forget that the great men and women of the Bible were just like you and me. We, like them, can be frightened of the enemy and of his tactics against those we love - unsure of what the Lord is ultimately doing in allowing us to undergo some of the suffering we must endure. Gideon’s life not only reflects the meekness of the Lamb of God, but also the fierceness of the Lion of the tribe of Judah.

One thing is consistent throughout the biblical narrative, and that is that God uses the weakest and the least of us to show forth His power, and in so doing the powers are disarmed and brought to open shame!

“And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him.”
- Colossians 2:13-15 ESV

Gideon started out insecure and unsure and as God spoke to him and encouraged him he grew to see and experience first hand the faithfulness of God. God discipled him throughout his journey of faith! Gideon’s confidence was in the Lord. He did not become arrogant but continued to declare the Lord as the Victor. His life is an example of someone who was discipled well. Gideon was always ready to listen and ask of God to ensure that he was not being presumptuous in his understanding of what God was doing through him. When we allow the Lord to disciple us, we too, can be used in mighty ways to confound the enemy and his cohorts. In order to be good disciples of Christ we must first be good listeners.

Have you ever noticed that your best friends are those who listen to you and, in turn, the ones to whom you learn to listen to? Good friendships are built on the principle of reciprocity in which each person values and responds to what the other is saying. Gideon and God had a friendship. When Gideon was unsure the Lord allowed him to talk and then assured him that He was with him.

“Arise, go down against the camp, for I have given it into your hand. But if you are afraid to go down, go down to the camp with Purah your servant. And you shall hear what they say, and afterward your hands shall be strengthened to go down against the camp.”
- Judges 7:9-11 ESV

We can have the same relationship with the Lord. God does not expect that we come to Him as a victorious foot soldier in His army, but He does show up in our weakness to make His name great through His power. When we respond to His voice, trusting in His power he strengthens our hands for the battle.

“Blessed be the LORD, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle;  he is my steadfast love and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield and he in whom I take refuge, who subdues the peoples under me.”
- Psalm 144:1-2

In order to be good disciples of Christ we must first be good listeners.

You see, when we are desperate, the Lord shows up! We do not need to prove to God that we are capable, but we do need to admit our utter dependence upon Him and His strength in order to come out victorious in the battle. Overcoming is not about our human victories, but it is about declaring who has helped us to win - just like Gideon did. When we declare that our right standing with God is based on the blood of Jesus and not on anything you or I have accomplished, then just as Rend Collective sings we are more than conquerors through Christ! Let us run to the safety of our great refuge which is Christ. Let us die to our own strength and hide in Him! Let us testify as we ride on the steed of our victorious Conquering King!

“For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to seperate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
- Romans 8:36-39 ESV

‘Then I heard a loud voice in heaven, saying, “Now the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God and the authority of his Christ have come, for the accuser of our brothers has been thrown down, who accuses them day and night before our God. And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death.’
- Revelation 12:10-11 ESV

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Karen Savage wants to live in a world where Christ is Glorified. When she's not serving her family, you can find her serving others. Her favorite Scripture is John 15:7-8 ESV.