Today’s team journal was written by our Finance Director, Christina Von Moll. 

I heard it said somewhere by someone that there are no coincidences when it comes to the things of God. When images and themes keep popping up in different circumstances it’s probably a good idea to pay attention. Lately for me, it’s been stones of remembrance. I’ve been studying Joshua with my local BSF class and our DWITW podcast live recording centered around women sharing testimonies of stones of remembrance in their lives. This coincidence led me to think about what stones I had to lay down in remembrance of all He has done in my life.

Here and now we can raise our thanksgiving to the Lord because there is so much to remember.

God saved me when I was a crushed and abused soul seeking worth in the attention and approval of the world. He used my brokenness to open my eyes to my need for a Savior. He used my less than ideal circumstances to stir my heart to desire the fullness of a life given over to that Savior. He opened my eyes to the reality of my spiritual depravity and for every lie that was struck down by the truth of His Word, a piece of my carefully curated mask was torn away. I started to run out of hiding places within myself and I was on the edge of complete surrender, complete trust, and completely finding my worth and identity in Him. This meant dying to the shame and broken mindset that was my default.

While teetering on the brink, I endured a confusing and toxic break up which fueled my fall back into shame. I was desperate to find rest in my old habits but quickly realized that it only lead to restlessness. I knew I was in rebellion and disobedient to the truth that had been so endearing to me. It was a dark season but God pursued me. He drew me in once again and I felt the call to repent of my disobedience and walk a new path. By the complete grace of God I met my husband during that bleak season. Four years and two amazingly beautiful kids later I can see His sovereign hand that brought me to this place. As I look back at what He’s done in my life, the disappointments and hardships I face now are put into perspective. God is completely and totally trustworthy and He will bring me through any trial.

“Here I’ll raise my Ebenezer
Hither by thy help I’m come”

These words from the famous hymn ”Come Thou Fount” resonate in my heart as I think on the testimonies He has written for me.

In the midst of disappointment, reversal, or any challenge we face. We can remember the grace of the Lord and His love over us. Whatever side of deliverance we may be on, whether He has called us to, through, or out of something we can raise our Ebenezer. With every stone, in every circumstance, we can thank the Lord for his lavish grace and faithfulness that has brought us right here. Here and now we can raise our thanksgiving to the Lord because there is so much to remember. Where we are matters and we should always remember the strength and the steadfast love of the Lord that brought us here. If you are going through difficulty, know that His faithfulness endures beyond any earthly circumstance and that this season is a light momentary affliction. One day as you look back it will be but another stone and testimony of His goodness. You’ll see how He used every circumstance to bring you here.

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Christina Von Moll wants to live in a world where coffee breaks are mandatory and kids actually sleep through the night. When she's not wrangling her two tiny children, you can find her binge-watching seasons of "The Office" or curled up with a good book and a cup of coffee.

Her favorite Scripture is 1 John 3:1-2, ESV.

If I could only convey through black and white text the sheer excitement that fills my body when I read those beautiful red words of Jesus in the Bible. The words spoken directly TO ME from Jesus. Yes, they are spoken to you as well. To everyone.

My limited human abilities to rationalize relationships requires me to generationalize God and Jesus- I know that is not a real word, but can we pretend it is? I mentally place God in the Father, or Grandfather generation. Jesus is like a brother. Anyone that knows me knows I adore my siblings so adding Jesus as a brother makes my family, basically, the best ever.

When it comes to siblings, I have more than a handful. I have seven. Seven. I adore these people and the special significant others they have. They give me so much joy there aren’t even words to describe it.

I didn’t have an easy family life growing up; there was a lot going on that left more than a few battle scars on most of us. One thing we always had was each other. The way my family is split, I have 3 of my sisters on my biological mother’s side. I lived with them, grew up with them. We did the day to day life together. I was the oldest, so I helped them get ready for dances, trained them on makeup, discussed boys.  I probably also did a bit of smothering. My other 4 siblings fall on my biological father’s side. I never lived with them, only saw them when I drove myself over there. They are quite a bit younger than me and it took until they were all adults for the relationships to really solidify.

How does this have anything to do with our current reading, you ask? I’m getting there. A few weeks ago, my precious stepmom sent me a text about my birthday. She wanted me to pick a restaurant or someplace to celebrate. I told her I didn’t have a preference, so she coordinated with my 3 local siblings from my father’s side to have dinner at home one evening. The truth is, I was feeling isolated and alone, unlovable almost. When she asked, I didn’t want to be around anyone, let alone celebrate my existence. (I do not enjoy sharing this vulnerable side of me.)

While still wallowing in this place of self-hate, I went to dinner at my beloved stepmom’s house. Based on my mood, dinner should have been a few lima beans, a chunk of gizzards with a dirty shoe for dessert. Instead, when I arrived, she had prepared a delicious chicken with mixed vegetables and cheesy potatoes followed by cake and cupcakes. My mom didn’t make a meal I felt I was worthy of, she made a meal SHE felt I was worthy of.

”But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.” Luke 15:20

In Luke 15 Jesus speaks to the crowd about the prodigal son. He explains how the youngest son is given his inheritance. The oldest son stays home, continues working for his father. The young son spends his money swiftly and quickly develops a low self-esteem. He soon feels as if he has no worth, as if he cannot return home to the family because he has done too much damage. He eventually decides going home to be an employee of his father’s would be better than starving to death. I’m sure many of you know the story, but just as a refresher, allow me to remind you: Upon seeing his son walking up the lane, the father immediately begins ordering a feast, a party for his returning son. Read that again… Upon seeing him walking up the lane! This is a crucial part of the story. The son didn’t have to apologize, beg forgiveness, work off the debt, start a charity, deliver pizza by camel. Nothing. He just had to return home.

God is quite the same with us. When we feel defeated, as if we could never show our makeup-streaked, puffy-eyed, snotty-nosed, ugly cry faces in public again, God runs down the lane to embrace us while the party is prepared. I know for me, that moment has happened more times than I care to admit. But I know how perfect it feels to just allow His glory to embrace me in my mess. Just like that night when I walked into my parent’s home and was embraced by my stepmom. She didn’t care that I had ugly cried that day. Neither did God. There was an abundance of love towards me because I existed. Even though that was the last thing I felt worthy to have showered upon me. The love God has for us was brought home again in John 11:35-36 when Jesus returns to the tomb of his friend Lazarus. He wept. The people who had followed him there said: “See how much He loved him!” No matter our place emotionally, Jesus loves us enough to weep when we die, metaphorically or physically. Can you imagine watching us make mistake after mistake as we navigate our lives? I’d want to reach down and shake us into submission!

While I completely understand why He doesn’t shake us into submission, I draw both a bit of perplexity as well as strength from Luke 10:19-20 when Jesus says, “Look, I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy, and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them. Nothing will injure you. But don’t rejoice because evil spirits obey you; rejoice because your names are registered in heaven.” This brings a sense of peace to a tumultuous heart. Knowing my name is written in heaven. Whoa. Nothing can calm a racing heart like that phrase, especially one in a state of self-pity. But that’s only half. We have authority over the enemy through God. Could there be a more stabilizing phrase in the world? God has granted us the ability to cast the demons away from our lives, to bring our lives back to Him, back to His grace. I can’t lie, it almost makes me feel like a superhero. Take that, enemy! I’ve got my super suit of God on and I’m sick of you so WHAP! Back to hell you go!

Chins up, ladies!! You are precious and loved! Snotty-nosed, ugly crying and broken. God still thinks you are beautiful, amazing, and unique. He is RUNNING down the lane to embrace you in your mess!

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 Sonya Gentry wants to live in a world where being kind and loving means that when we encounter a need or brokenness, we say yes first and think about it second. This would be a world where walking with Jesus means trying to act like Jesus through loving, relevant acts of service; where Christians put their hands and feet in the dirty situations of the world in order to show people God’s love and grace; where we understand that comfort zones are meant to be broken because people need us to show up and be be the best portrayal of God’s love we can be. When she's not working, you can find her being silly with friends and family, playing games with her nephews, volunteering for various organizations and events with her church, or relaxing with a movie.

What comes out of our mouths on a regular basis? Are we speaking life into situations and people or are we speaking death? Are we missing the mark as far as recognizing what words or actions would be most helpful and encouraging at any given moment? 

In Matthew 15:16-20, Jesus explains how what comes out of our mouths is of greater importance than doing what appears to be the right thing as He addresses His disciples about the Pharisee’s criticism: “Do you not see whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled? But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. These are what defile a person.”

Let’s not just look into the mirror of the Word today and forget what we have seen after we leave.

We have a great opportunity to learn from what He is saying here. Let’s not just look into the mirror of the Word today and forget what we have seen after we leave. Let us allow it to impact our hearts and minds, as well as the lives of others. The Pharisees were continually scrutinizing what Jesus said and did or did not do based on the law. They failed to see the real importance of God’s commands and chose to view their age-old traditions as the primary focus of their lives. They missed the whole point!

Jesus was and is more concerned with our hearts than our performance and He is certainly much more concerned that we set our minds on the things of God, not on the things of man. (Matthew 16:23) I am reminded of the time when my husband and I visited a church and upon being greeted by an older gentleman, he asked us if we were saved. I responded ‘yes’ and at the time my husband was an atheist so he answered ‘no’. To which, the man immediately responded, “Your marriage will never last.”  This man thought he was doing his duty for the Lord by speaking critically over our marriage.  Could he not see that we had come to church together? He missed a great opportunity to encourage us but rather out of tradition, not even from a scriptural standpoint, he proceeded to speak a curse over our lives. He had missed the point altogether because his eyes were focused on the things of man. 

As Jesus addressed the Pharisee’s concern about hand washing he made it very clear that they were missing the point: “And why do you break the commandment of God for the sake of your tradition? For God commanded, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.’” (Matthew 15:3-4)Their mouths revealed that they were only thinking of themselves in their attempt to do the right thing. They were trying to catch Jesus up and prove him wrong, all for the sake of their own law. How often do we criticize others while they are speaking, weighing what or how they said something, trying to catch them up in some fault. Christians too can be Pharisees in practice.

Will we expose our hearts to the scalpel of the Word, in order that we would be wholly honoring to our Father in Heaven by honoring others with our mouths?

Are we quick to criticize and slow to show the love of God, thinking that we will not be honoring our Father in heaven if we don’t say something for fear that we will “miss an opportunity”? Or are we looking for opportunities to point out in others, with our speech, what we see that is good and glorifying to our Father? Thankfully the lovingkindness of the Father indeed led my husband to repentance despite the efforts of a modern day Pharisee. 

When we honor others with our mouths we honor God in heaven. So let us look into the word of God which is quick and powerful and sharper than any double-edged sword, able to penetrate and divide the thoughts and intents of our hearts so that we will be a well-spring of encouragement and grace to those around us. As women of God we have a great responsibility and opportunity to encourage those around us.  All too often we look for what is “not right” in other’s lives and we miss the opportunity to show real genuine love, the kind of love Jesus displayed toward a Canaanite woman later in Matthew 15. Jesus forsook the view that the house of Israel took precedence over all other people, and He listened to what came out of the woman’s mouth and recognized the faith that was in her heart.

“But she came and knelt before him, saying, ‘Lord, help me.’ And he answered, ‘It is not right to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.’ She said, ‘Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters’ table.’ Then Jesus answered her, ‘O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.’ And her daughter was healed instantly.”  Matthew 15:25-28

Will we choose to be sanctified by His powerful Word in order to expose our traditional patterns of thought that are contrary to a mind of the Spirit? Our thoughts come from our heart and they affect our attitudes and speech as well as our approach toward others. Will we expose our hearts to the scalpel of the Word, in order that we would be wholly honoring to our Father in Heaven by honoring others with our mouths? Lord, help us not miss the point!

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 Karen Savage wants to live in a world where Christ is Glorified. When she's not serving her family, you can find her serving others. Her favorite Scripture is John 15:7-8 ESV.

 Today’s team journal was written by our Content Director, Jillian Vincent.

I’m dirt poor. Desperately lacking. Have no reserves left. There is no emergency fund. But this has nothing to do with my bank account. No, the poverty I feel is a poverty of energy, a poverty of time, and a poverty of patience. This is the poverty of a mother with 3 kids under 3, and one on the way. Yes, you read that correctly. We are expecting another baby in April! I think I’m excited, but I can’t tell where the excitement went. It is covered over by being tired, the feeling of chaos, and dirty underwear.

Every evening, I pass out on my bed after getting the last baby to sleep and wish I had more to give. There is a husband to love. There is laundry to do. There is a ministry to lead. There is a book to write. But I’ve got NOTHING. I am broke and feel broken as a result.

It is here that I read again the story of the Widow’s Mite. Tucked into just 4 verses in the great gospel of Luke, Jesus holds this woman up as an example to all as He teaches in the temple at Jerusalem. Here is the short account in Luke 21:1-4:

“Jesus looked up and saw the rich putting their gifts into the offering box, and he saw a poor widow put in two small copper coins. And he said, “Truly, I tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”

I never saw myself as the widow before. I am surrounded by my family! I’m far from alone, with babies hanging all over me, am I not? Yet, I turn my pockets empty at the things I used to do, the person I used to be. God, should not I quit everything if I have nothing to give? What kind of mother am I? What kind of wife? What kind of leader?

One who sees the abundance of Christ. I have but a mite, and it is gone by mid-day in this season, but what I have is from the Lord! Who I am to say it is not enough?  So I’ve been praying this prayer lately:

Lord, I give it all, everything I have to you! Multiply my offerings! I am not enough, and I don’t have enough to give, but I have you! I trust you when you say “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10). I pray this abundant season would not be stolen from me but would be a season of wealth and gratitude.

What you are called to give is what you’ve been given.

A life lived with Christ is one that shares in HIS abundance, giving no longer out of OUR poverty, but out of HIS wealth. And praise the Lord, His energy does not run dry (Isaiah 40:28)! His time does not run out ( Psalm 90:2)! And His patience? He is much slower to anger than I have been or could ever be (Psalm 145:8).

When I was a child, my mother’s favorite song to sing to me was the old hymn “Give Thanks.” I am the fourth child, so it is not lost on me that my mother was all kinds of tired at that point, and giving still. But in her particular poverty, she sang these lyrics, “Give thanks, with a grateful heart. Give thanks, to the Holy One. Give thanks because He’s given Jesus Christ, His Son! And now, let the weak say I am strong! Let the poor say I am rich! Because of what the Lord has done, for us! Give thanks!” She had a mite, but she was rich indeed!

Sister, how are you feeling poor, empty, or lacking today? We are not called to be rich in any sort to live with and for Jesus. What you are called to give is what you’ve been given. God looks at your mite and calls it MIGHTY. We give great thanks for it, however small it is! Because Jesus, in His abundance, gave it to us! So thank you, Lord, for the abundance of your grace, and the abundance you bring to my life! Let the poor say I am rich, because of what you’ve done for me.

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Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers. 

I’ve never been good at resting. My sleep at night is fitful at best because my mind is constantly spinning. I’m always thinking over conversations from earlier in the day, imagining a dozen different scenarios that could happen, but probably won’t . . . but still, they could. In my mind, I’m participating in discussions I’ve already had, but this time when I replay them I’m not sticking my foot in my mouth or stuttering over my words, trying to avoid tears. I stay up considering all the ways I might actually be draining (like people have told me) and then I internalize the deep sadness that comes with such knowledge.

So I sleep at night, but fitfully. I’m a better napper than a sleeper, if I can be honest. Naps come swift, because I’ve been running a marathon in my brain from the night before and there’s really only so much for which caffeine can compensate. And so, I face many days with a weariness that feels heavy enough to bend my neck uncomfortably. Add to that chronic anxiety, and getting out of bed on most mornings feels like an astronomical athletic feat I won’t ever possess the prowess to overcome. Needless to say, I am tired.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace… Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11: 28-30 (MSG)

I wrote this version of Scripture on a bright, yellow Post-It and put it in my Bible. I suppose when I first read The Message translation, I wanted to remember the breath of relief I took. I can imagine I felt a great sense of surrender, placing it in my worn Bible.

Even in the darkness, I know He longs to be this and so much more to anyone who will seek Him.

On good days, when I am not only thinking about how Jesus is my resting place, but am believing it, too, I turn to these words and trust that He is the only one who can teach me about free and light living. But... we can be honest with each other, right, ladies? Most days, I’m just chanting Jesus is my resting place for fear I will forget it entirely in the midst of rushing to keep up, sprinting to correct, and longing to not be so crippled with self-doubt all the time.

It is quite difficult for me to wrap my head around a God who asks me to keep company with Him. Some days I believe it, and it makes me think faith means that there will be days the wrestling is less, and days when the wrestling is all-encompassing. Currently, I’m in a season of all-encompassing. But I turn to look at that yellow Post-It note in my worn down Bible and I feel Jesus nudging me with particular words:

Recover. He breaks through the cacophonous drone of words and names that have been slung at me, the ones that leech onto the skin and set up house. Little one, I’ll recover who you really are from the piles of lies you’ve allowed yourself to be buried beneath. I am your recovery.

Real. He stands tall and true in the face of the tension between the reality He writes and the reality I’m believing. Hey, sister, I am the real deal and I know all your real, too. Every bump and struggle and scar – I’ve got you seconds before you do what you’re considering and I’ll catch you in the aftermath of whatever happens. I am your reality.

Company. He is relational. He is the best relationship. And He wants to have relationship with everyone. I think this is what breaks my heart wide open more than anything. When the world, when people in my world, are scolding and correcting or telling me that I’m not enough or too much, Christ is sitting on the couch out in the living room waiting for me to curl up. My girl, stop fighting, stop racing, just stop. I am your safe zone. I want to keep you company.

I don’t know that I’ll ever have this rest thing figured out, or if I’ll ever be so confident in my identity in Christ that stinging words won’t leave marks, but if I’m going to be tired, I want it to be because I’ve fought to find in Jesus my recovery, my reality, and my best company. Even in the darkness, I know He longs to be this and so much more to anyone who will seek Him. May we all find space today to confess our exhaustion to our Father and ask Him boldly to be our remedy.

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Steph Duff wants to live in a world where every human, whether small or regular-sized, learns to use their voice and is seen and known. When she's not traveling and story telling with Back2Back Ministries, you'll likely find her drinking excessive cups of coffee, with her nose in a book, or daydreaming about India. Her favorite scripture is Habakkuk 1:5, and she prays for a world in which Jesus is the name on every lip. Learn a little more about her love for semi-colons, what stirs her blood, and the yearnings of her heart over at www.stephaniduff.wordpress.com.

 A baby comes into the world looking for someone to look for them. – Curt Thompson

I wonder if we ever outgrow this? Curt Thompson uses the noun “baby,” but I have to believe we could substitute any variety of other nouns, and it would be true: A vulnerable adolescent. An angst-ridden teen. A widowed man. A woman with a reputation. Even in the hardest of seasons, I believe one is always looking for someone to look for them.

In John chapter 4, we meet a woman of Samaria with a reputation that could widen many eyes. Five times she’s been married, and her current beau isn’t even her betrothed. I can imagine the people of Sychar whispering behind their hands as this woman walked past them to the well. I imagine her walking with her eyes fixed on the ground, not wanting to address the truths and fallacies of what her townspeople were saying. And yet, I feel convinced she was hoping to find someone looking for her; I don’t think a woman uninterested in being sought would go to the trouble of marrying five times and then sharing a bed with a man who wasn’t hers in the first place. She was in the pursuit of looking for someone looking for her.

Each day we rise with the knowledge of our own stories. Whether self-awareness is in play or not, we know what our histories hold. Each day, this woman of Samaria faced the people who lived alongside her in Sychar, knowing the beds she’d shared, the loves she’d buried, the hope she still held - despite it all. We know all those intricacies about ourselves, but it isn’t often many others have full disclosure on our personal privacies. Either because it’s none of their business, or we are simply private people, or perhaps others don’t know because they are just too heavy or they feel too undignified to offer up to another. So, we stifle, keep to ourselves, remain tight-lipped, but we are ever looking.

He just doesn’t care what other people think. He’s not concerned about labels, He doesn’t follow normative, societal patterns. He just wants to bring folks to His Dad and love the stuffing out of them.

Imagine with me what that day must have felt like for the woman of Samaria . . . it’s just another day. She needs water, so she goes to the source. Not expecting anything abnormal, she’s perhaps thinking about whatever she did the night before, the last conversation she shared, maybe pondering the situation she’s currently in with a married man. She arrives at the well and finds a Jewish man, sealing the deal that she will not be speaking, free to remain in her thoughts.

But Jesus has another plan.

“Give me a drink,” He says. I imagine she whirled around, stunned by the audacity and boldness of this stranger to speak to her, a woman of Samaria. And in this moment, everything changes.

Now I think we could dive into a variety of reasons why this passage holds importance. The one I always hone in on, however, and the one I wrote in my sloppy handwriting in the margins between the text, is simple: He speaks to her.

This is unique for a couple reasons – He’s a Jew and she a citizen of Samaria – these were not folks who mingled at the annual block party.  He’s a man and she’s a woman - and unless you were married, men and women just didn’t talk shop at the local watering hole. Jesus is scandalous, ya’ll.

And I don’t want us to overlook these things. In fact, these things add up to one of the biggest reasons I’m so crazy about Jesus – He just doesn’t care what other people think. He’s not concerned about labels, He doesn’t follow normative, societal patterns. He just wants to bring folks to His Dad and love the stuffing out of them. It’s a big deal.

But let’s go back to that first quote in the beginning; a baby comes into the world looking for someone to look for them. Now substitute some words to describe our gal at the well, in for “baby.”

A woman with a reputation is in the world looking for someone to look for her.

A woman with questionable relationship patterns is in the world looking for someone to look for her.

A woman yearning for relationship is in the world looking for someone to look for her.

A traumatized woman is in the world looking for someone to look for her.

Sound familiar? This woman then, doesn’t seem so different than us. How often, when we are seeking something or someone, do we look up? (Or in her case, right in front of us?)

I imagine the woman of Samaria and I probably would’ve been fast friends. I’ve never been married, and I don’t share beds with men who belong to another woman, but I’ve had some missteps in my narrative. And even knowing everything I know about my own story, I still look to be looked for.

And I know Jesus is still waiting at the proverbial well. He will always ask the questions, though He’s got the answers. He will always seek us out, though He’s aware of our coordinates. He speaks to us - no matter where we’ve been, where we’re thinking about going, no matter what.

He is waiting, sisters, with our full history in hand, to ensure that, whether we even know to look for Him in the first place, He never stops looking for us.

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Steph Duff wants to live in a world where every human, whether small or regular-sized, learns to use their voice and is seen and known. When she's not traveling and story telling with Back2Back Ministries, you'll likely find her drinking excessive cups of coffee, with her nose in a book, or daydreaming about India. Her favorite scripture is Habakkuk 1:5, and she prays for a world in which Jesus is the name on every lip. Learn a little more about her love for semi-colons, what stirs her blood, and the yearnings of her heart over at www.stephaniduff.wordpress.com. 

Today's team journal was written by our Social Media Manager, Kelly Gwin.

“We walk by faith, not by sight.”

What does it look like for you to walk by faith in your life right now? The Lord has been training me in this area for some time now, and staying true to my own form, it's taken me until very recently to realize that. I know I’m supposed to trust God and not lean on my own understanding (Prov. 3:5-6), but when circumstances in life are truly proving to make zero sense to me, that knowledge suddenly becomes very difficult to walk out. A trial that seems to have no end in sight, a new depth of intimacy with God that I’ve been longing for, but that comes with uncertainty and perhaps criticism, and new insights from His Word that all point me to one thing: faith.

We've been praying the Lord’s prayer together as a church community for the past few months, and I’ve been using that model in my own prayer time and expanding on the various elements with the Lord as I pray through all the things in my heart and life. And seemingly when I get to “your kingdom come” all these things begin to well up and spill out. I’m asking for the Lord’s return, but I’ve been asking for so much more. I’m asking for the fullness of His kingdom in my life, in my marriage, in my home, and my church community. I’m asking for His kingdom to come in my parenting as I walk through intense difficulty with a child who I know was made for His glory, but has me daily on my knees in defeat. I want ALL of what it means to belong to the God of the universe, the God of the Bible. I’m continually reading stories of extraordinary things that happen in the lives of Biblical characters and realizing I'm lacking. Where are these extraordinary things in my life? I know He’s the same God. I know He’s got the same desires, the same power, the same willingness that He had then. So what’s missing? Faith.

So, in my life right now walking by faith and not by sight means leaning into the strange and uncomfortable things that I see in God’s Word

Now let me clarify that, in Christ, I am missing nothing. In Christ, there is no lack. What God is doing now is showing me more of who He is, and the way He sometimes does this is just different than the way we had planned. Can I get an “amen?” If I want to hear His voice and obey to the uttermost the way Ezekiel did, the way Abraham and Moses did, the way the early church disciples did - hearing very specifically from God and moving forward with action in confidence that they heard their Father’s voice - that requires faith. If I believe in a God of miracles and want to walk in the Holy Spirit who imparts gifts that are meant to be in operation, that requires faith. If I am going to faithfully continue to believe that God is good and has a glorious plan for my daily struggles in parenting, and all the sin that abounds in it, that requires faith.

So, in my life right now walking by faith and not by sight means leaning into the strange and uncomfortable things that I see in God’s Word, but not in many churches. It means having confidence that if I’m His sheep, then I do hear His voice and I can obey with confidence. I can trust the Holy Spirit and His Word to guide me without fear of the results. Walking by faith means trusting in a God that’s beyond my understanding when I feel like I just can't make it another day as the mother of a child I love so dearly. It means letting go of absolutely everything the world expects of me and clinging only to Jesus, because He’s proven Himself trustworthy. I would love to end by sharing a personal paraphrase of Hebrews chapter 12 that God prompted me to write this morning (of course) as a letter from Him to me, and maybe from Him to you.

“You have my Word to see that by faith all these people walked in obedience and didn’t even receive the promise that I was later faithful to give. You have the benefit of seeing my faithfulness because of them. You can see that I keep my promises, and that my word is true.

Because of this, throw off your sin and run by faith the path I’ve set before YOU. Looking to me, the One who gave you this faith in the first place, and who is sanctifying you. I have taken the weight of shame and condemnation off of you on the cross so that you can do this without growing weary. You will not have to endure what I endured for you. This is discipline; loving training in holiness. Because you are my daughter, and I desire LIFE for you. I’m doing all things for your good. So that you will be with Me and be like Me. So that you will be strengthened and healed. Strive for peace and holiness with those I’ve put in your life. Make sure that you are pouring out the grace that I’ve poured out onto you, not allowing room for bitterness. Because you belong to Me - the One who’s already covered it all so you can walk by faith that these promises are secure in me. Don’t turn from Me. Don't resist Me. Listen to Me and trust Me. There are consequences if you don’t. Either way, I have seen to it that you will receive my unshakeable kingdom and that you will stand unshaken in it. So be grateful and worship me with fear and awe, in light of who I am. I am your God. God Almighty.”

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Kelly Gwin wants to live in a world where deep heart-talks happen at the top of every hour (you know, ones where everyone cries), gardens thrive without effort, and all the walls are white. When she's not discipling her 3 young girls and trying to keep her coffee hot, you can find her serving and living life with her Faith Christian Fellowship Dayton family, listening to some sort of podcast, or being "social" on behalf of DWITW.

Her favorite Scriptures are: Psalm 86:8 and Romans 5:8.

September has rolled in and with it come the beginnings of change. Cooler breezes ruffle the trees. Frost tickles the edges of morning. Fall, in all of its multicolored glory, is imminent. The calendar on my kitchen wall testifies that summer has officially ended; and more than that, it has been a stalwart herald of hope in this season of fading warmth. Above its grid of numbered days extend a pair of watercolor red clovers accompanied by the words of Psalm 126:5:

“Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy!”

When I think of this I feel as though my current days are defined by the tears they garner - tears of frustration, of relief, of sadness, of hurt, of regret, of repentance. Oh, how I long for the days that carry an outcry of joy. But to reach these joyful days, I must sow and steward the tears of this season. I also I think of the Israelites, their way of life steeped in the art and work of agriculture, and I wonder what it meant for them ‘to sow in tears.’

In our readings for DWITW 365 this week, Psalm 126 follows the events of Ezra and Nehemiah. The exiles have returned to Jerusalem. The temple and city walls have been rebuilt. The Israelites and those who have separated themselves for the Lord (Neh. 10:28) have committed anew to the Mosaic covenant given on Mt. Sinai so many generations ago. The people have at last begun to truly remember who God is, what He has done, and all He said He would do. And this psalm is a lament to Him.

In the first three verses the psalmist recalls God’s restoration, faithfulness, and great deeds which have given gladness to the Israelite community. They had lost much in their lives due to their own wayward unfaithfulness to the God they had once said they knew. The Israelites were cast out from their families, their homes, and the very Promised Land they had received. And all this was to save their hearts from the veiled deceit and wickedness they had begun to nurture, and ultimately to turn their eyes back to the God who called them His own. Though weighted with sorrow, a lament need not be devoid of hope. And so this lament begins anchored in the fertile ground of joy-infused renewal, daring us to remember the dreamlike wonder of what it means to be restored (Ps. 126:1).

From the recollection of this mercy, comes an outflow of hopeful prayer: 

“Restore our fortunes, O Lord,
like streams in the Negev!
Those who sow in tears
shall reap with shouts of joy!
He who goes out weeping,
bearing the seed for sowing,
shall come home with shouts of joy,
bringing his sheaves with him.”
- Psalm 126:4-6

The psalmist compares the people to a desert region in southern Judah (the Negev) which he’s saying would flourish with vibrant plant life again, if its water-worn ravines were to be filled with streams once again. As I read this I feel arid places in my life - ones that I have tried to water with loving others well, keeping a tidy home, or being a good wife and mother. But these are things that are not meant to be my ultimate sources of life. These are things that are meant to flow from the ultimate Source of life, Christ Himself. I am not meant to fill the gullies that stand in my desert when I run dry, but instead I am to ask Jesus to fill them with His presence. I need the Living Water to fill and overflow these places.

And as I ask Him to prepare and tend the soil of my heart, I still need to go about the work that is mine to do. Because living is work. Relationships are work. And there is sowing to be done. So I pray and talk to the God who hears me when I cry out, the One who loves me better than I know. Therefore, I read His Word and linger and meditate on it to catch a better glimpse of Him than before. I listen for His Spirit to give direction to my steps.

Though I cannot control the seasons or the cycle of harvest, I know the God who does. And so I must rely on Him to do the work He has always done. It is the Lord who whispers to the seed when it is time for sprouting. It is by His prompting that the sun shines and the rain falls. It is by His hand that the work of transformation is done.

our eternity is meant to be spent in His glorious presence, making much of who He is and reveling in the joy of shouting His name as we come home.

So, whether you are feeling weighed down by sorrow, or bursting at the seams with shouts of joy, you need not pretend you are in any season other than the one you find yourself in. Fight to remember what is true. The truth is: That you, dear sister, are loved by the holy God that made you. And there is no one else that He would rather hear from or spend time with - He wants and desires you. You are precious to Him whether you are weeping or shouting and He is there with you in the midst of it. He is within you in the midst of it.

We cannot taste life without Jesus, just as a clover cannot grow or blossom without rain. We cannot flourish apart from the Author of life itself. We were made for Him. While we are not promised earthly days marked by ease or happiness, our eternity is meant to be spent in His glorious presence, making much of who He is and reveling in the joy of shouting His name as we come home.

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 Robin Zastrow wants to live in a world where coffee never gets cold and kindness abounds. When she's not discovering the wonders of construction paper and cardboard tubes with her two little ones, you can find her sneaking in another few pages of a book or jotting down bits of writing on scraps of paper.

One of her favorite Scriptures is:“Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you.” Psalm 33:20-22 ESV

In the book of Daniel, the prophet acknowledges time and time again the dominion of the one true God -through his actions, words, and visions. Daniel proclaimed the Lord’s dominion when he refused to eat the Babylonian King’s pagan-sacrificed food (Daniel 1), he declared God’s dominion when he interpreted Nebuchadnezzar’s dreams (Daniel 2&4), and he made God’s dominion known when he didn’t stop praying to the one true God even though there was a decree to pray only to King Darius (Daniel 6). And by consequence, Daniel entered the lion’s den and the Lord then showed His own dominion by sparing His faithful servant from the lion’s menacing jowls.

Daniel is the only book in the Bible we find this specific Aramaic word for “dominion,” and it is repeated 9 times throughout the book. It is the word “sholtan,” and it means sovereignty or realm. In English, it translates as “the power or right of governing and controlling; sovereign authority, rule; control; domination; a territory, usually of considerable size, in which a single rulership holds sway.”

Keeping these definitions in mind, two verses in Daniel particularly caught my eye which used the term dominion. Daniel 7:13-14 says, “I saw in the night visions, and behold, with the clouds of heaven there came one like a son of man, and he came to the Ancient of Days and was presented before him. And to him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve him; his dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and his kingdom one that shall not be destroyed.”

Although Daniel did not know it at the time, he was speaking of Jesus, our one true King. Jesus identifies himself as the Son of Man in Matt 8:20, 24:30, and 26:64. This identification absolutely scandalized the Pharisees, the religious rulers of his day. To them, it was complete and utter blasphemy. Jesus was claiming His dominion, and they did not want Him to have it.

Sister, Jesus has dominion, whether or not you give it to Him. He is Lord and King over all peoples, nations, and languages. Foremost, He should be Lord and King over the complete territory of your heart. The question really is, do you give Him power, rule, and authority, like Daniel did? Does He have true reign over your every decision, thought, and passion? Does He rule over your relationships, possessions, money, jobs, and family? Do you submit to Him in everything as your king?

What are you still trying to hold your own dominion over? Jesus wants it all, and it is all rightfully His.

And, further, what are you still trying to hold your own dominion over? Jesus wants it all, and it is all rightfully His. His dominion is a great mercy because in reality we are poor rulers over ourselves anyhow. We have proven that endlessly since we, along with Adam and Eve, have tried continually to rule over our own gardens.

Jesus is our King and should be our only King. This is a scandalous notion, indeed. It will absolutely set you apart in every way from this world, whose citizens claim that it is every person’s right to have dominion over themselves. It will be offensive and will get you thrown into the lion’s den. We must trust the everlasting dominion of our God will be more powerful than any den we may face. Look at Jesus! This claim got Him crucified! They labeled His cross correctly: “King of the Jews.”

And yet, Jesus has dominion even over death - the tomb couldn’t keep Him down! His dominion is our greatest hope, even beyond death and the grave. As Paul proclaims in 1 Corinthians 15:55, so we can also proclaim: “O death where is your sting? O death, where is your victory?”

So, when we keep dominion for ourselves or try give it to other false rulers, we forfeit our only hope and victory that is ours in our true King. Let us give complete homage today to the only One who deserves full dominion, Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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 Jillian Vincent loves Jesus. She's a wife, mother of two boys and a Dayton enthusiast. Jillian currently is a stay at home mama and spends nap times writing and discipling other women. She would (almost) die for an avocado, a cup of coffee made by her husband, a novel that makes her cry, and a bouquet of sunflowers.

Today's team journal was written by our Team Lead, Natalie Herr. 

“King Zedekiah said to Jeremiah, ‘I am afraid of the Judeans who have deserted to the Chaldeans, lest I be handed over to them and they deal cruelly with me.’ Jeremiah said, ‘You shall not be given over to them. Obey now the voice of the Lord in what I say to you, and it shall be well with you, and your life shall be spared.” -Jeremiah 38:19-20

There’s a story I want to share with you from the book of Jeremiah. It’s about an exchange between Jeremiah the prophet and King Zedekiah. Let me set the scene for you: Nebuchadnezzar, King of Babylon, put Zedekiah on the throne. The people of Judah were in a time of turmoil and upheaval, and Zedekiah was chosen to be the one who would decide if God’s people would surrender to the Chaldeans, come under their rule and therefore escape their attacks on the city of Jerusalem. Zedekiah acted like he wanted to hear from the Lord on this decision (Jer. 37:3,17; 38:14), but ultimately he did not want to accept the difficult truth that Jeremiah had to deliver. Jeremiah was proclaiming to the king and the public that those who stayed in the city would die by fire, and those who surrendered and went into exile would live, and the city would be spared. As you can imagine, that’s not what the leaders wanted to hear, so they threw Jeremiah in jail and stuck him in a cistern and ignored his message from God.

In Jeremiah’s last exchange with Zedekiah, the king opens up and tells Jeremiah that he’s scared. He doesn’t want to surrender to the Chaldeans because he’s afraid he’ll be hurt or killed. This is a very candid and vulnerable admission from a king. So, how does Jeremiah respond? He says to Zedekiah:

“Obey now the voice of the Lord in what I say to you, and it shall be well with you, and your life shall be spared.” Jer. 38:20

Jeremiah pleads with his king; promising that if he would only obey, he would experience the protection and favor of the Lord. If he obeys, then God will save him. Zedekiah is at a decision point. Will he obey God NOW and surrender? Or will he shrink back in fear?

The text tells us that after this, Zedekiah stuck Jeremiah back in house arrest and did nothing. Zedekiah chose not to obey. He chose not to act. He let his fear dictate his actions. Because of his fear, he was captured, watched his children be slaughtered, was struck with blindness and bound in chains as his city burned to the ground. Time was of the essence. The outcome of the whole nation was based on his obedience. But he refused to obey the Lord.

If you’ve continued reading this far, you’ve probably caught on to the point I’m trying to make. God called Zedekiah to obey his voice - and to do it right away. There was no time to waste. Lives were at stake. God was asking him to act out of obedience, not out of fear; he was asking him to trust Him for the outcome, even if it was scary to do so.

God was asking him to act out of obedience, not out of fear; he was asking him to trust Him for the outcome, even if it was scary to do so.

The concept of obedience is hard for us to accept because we want to be in charge. We want to make our own choices. Like Zedekiah, we want to consult God and get his opinion, but we want to ultimately make the final decision ourselves. We want the freedom to walk the other way if we don’t like what God has to say. And the thing that’s very clear in this story is that we actually have this choice! We have the freedom to choose the other way, to go against God. It’s what we’ve been doing as a human race ever since that first mistake in the Garden of Eden. We wait for His voice and when we finally hear it, we get scared. We fear the obedient route because it’s often not the easy route. We shrink back when it feels like He’s asking too much of us.

I can totally relate to Zedekiah here. There are so many times I feel inadequate and scared; not up to the tasks God has asked me to complete. I look at the effort it takes to be a loving spouse or train up Godly children or keep an orderly home or serve my church or take care of my body or run a ministry in His name... and it all seems like too much. It seems like it’s not going to work. It seems like it’s too hard for me. But when God asked Zedekiah to obey, he didn’t leave him wondering what the result would be. He told him clearly: You won’t die! It well be WELL with you. Your life will be spared. Step out in faith NOW and do what I’m asking you to do.

That phrase “be well” is yatab in Hebrew, meaning: to be good, pleasing, glad, joyful, beautiful, right. You see, obedience is good for us. It brings joy. It is right. It is what is in our favor.

I believe that principle stands for us, too. I believe when we choose to obey, it will be yatab. We will experience blessing. Deuteronomy 6:24 tells us that obedience is “for our good (our yatab!) always.” Always! It might not be simple or enjoyable or popular to obey, but it is for our good AND for the good of those around us. Zedekiah had the opportunity to save others’ lives and homes from the fire, but instead, he let everything burn to the ground. Our choices are not just about us. As relational beings, we have the opportunity to bless others with our obedience, as well.

Our choices are not just about us. As relational beings, we have the opportunity to bless others with our obedience, as well.

And so, as Jeremiah called up Zedekiah, I’ll do the same for us. Is there an area of your life where God is asking you to obey NOW? Is there something He keeps bringing up that you keep putting off?

I beg you, my friend: obey his voice NOW. Don’t wait until you feel ready or you have everything you think you need. Go scared. Trust him to work out all the details. Ask Him to help you believe in the power of the Holy Spirit to work in and through your imperfect self. For me right now, that looks like agreeing to setting my alarm early to meet with Him and move my body, even though I’m afraid I won’t follow through. That little step of obedience has the power to change my days and my interactions with others. So, what about you - what does it look like for you to go and obey, even if you’re scared?

Lord, may we all go the way of obedience by the power of your Spirit. May we listen and obey NOW, before it’s too late. Help us refuse to be controlled by fear, and in Jesus’ name, may we never have to watch another city burn.

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Natalie Herr is the founder and team leader of Dayton Women in the Word. She is a servant of God, a wife, a mom of four and a God-sized dreamer. She loves teaching and equipping women with God's Word.